It's the Future™. Why Don't Cars Look Futuristic?

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When you think back to the last scifi movie you watched, if you're like me, what stood out the most in the every day city scenes were the cars. This is where the set designers had a lot of creative freedom to make the various vehicles look wildly different from what we drive today, and from each other.

Minority Report had some awesome futuristic car designs. So did Will Smith's "I, Robot", and Blade Runner. I still sometimes scrub through Back to the Future II just to scope out the rad looking cars that are parked all around Hill Valley in 2015.

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...Ssssssooooo...where are those cars today? With the exception of some beauties like the Model S and Model 3, new cars all seem to look like samey streamlined McVehicles. There is none of the daring, stylish futuristic aesthetic from these science fiction films.

It's not as if auto makers don't constantly show off such designs. They're teases like that. The concept for a new car always looks way more radical and interesting than what we actually get. The 'Rule of Boring' in action.

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When such cars do come out, they are expensive and produced only in limited runs, or as kits. What is this baboozery? I'm not alone in feeling this way, either. The concept for the Chevy Volt was widely praised, and then the changes they made for the dull, "safe" final design were widely panned by those same automotive news outlets.

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I don't know about you, but I want to live in the future that scifi promised me, and automotive design is a big part of that. There are some good reasons why the final versions of cars are less exciting, like material costs, but in many cases it's just a 'safer' design that market research and some joyless algorithm told them would appeal to the widest possible range of buyers.

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What ever happened to cars with a distinct identity? Not made for everybody's tastes, but for the taste of a specific kind of person? Back when auto makers had a specific demographic in mind when designing a new car, and when cars were an expression of the driver's personality.

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I do not want to hear that it complicates manufacturing in the age of 3D printing and generalized robotic fabrication. If automakers despair that millenials are opting out of car ownership because of the cost, preferring instead car share programs, public transit and bicycles (often electric) then take notes. You can persuade them to buy cars again if you make cars desirable again.

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That's something Elon Musk said about the Roadster and Model S. That the electric car was going nowhere until it could be made into an object of desire. It had to shed the boring, responsible, environmental image because that's not sexy. He knew he had to make the electric car sexy to revive it, and he was right.

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If Tesla, why not other auto makers? Why not all cars? There is no car which cannot be improved by making it sexier. If they can look cooler, what good reason is there why they shouldn't? Why should we live in a boring world when we don't have to? Make everything cooler, starting with cars.

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Cool isn't only for sports cars either. Why not cool mini-vans? Why not cool delivery trucks? Is there actually any reason at all why any car shouldn't be fucking awesome? It's not like auto makers don't know how, either. They know how. They dangle it in front of us all the time, tantalizing us with designs they never put into production.

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I don't want to hear excuses anymore. I don't want to gaze longingly at concepts that I'll never see on the highway. I assure you, I'm quite done with that. I don't know exactly how to communicate the extent to which I am totally, forever done with that.

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No more disappointment! No more failed promises of a future never to be! Follow Elon's lead and make those promises real, post haste! Stop playing it so safe, reach for glory.......But maybe don't go too crazy with it:

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