INTIMATE VIOLENCE - LEAVE OR DIE!! PART 1
"Open the fucking door!!!" It was 1:00am ,the neighbourhood was quiet as everyone had gone to bed."I said Open this door!!!" Yemi shouted as his staggered to keep his balance. Just then,Iyanu,his second born and first daughter opened the door. She was woken by the noise made by her drunk father. Iyanu was 12 years old but looked more matured for her age.She was very beautiful,a carbon copy of her mother. "Daddy welcome",She said as Yemi staggered in. " Didn't you hear my knocks?" His breath wrecked of alcohol. "I will teach you not to leave your husband waiting for too long",He grabbed her and pushed her to a nearby couch.As he was trying to forcefully have his way with her, Bisi came running and pushed him away.
Bisi was a slim,beautiful,middle aged woman in her late 40's. She was married to Yemi for about 20 years and still loved him despite his shortcomings. "Get off your daughter!!!" She screamed. She unknowingly fell asleep while waiting for her husband's return. She had had a hectic day and couldn't help but rest her head when it got so late. She was suddenly woken by screams which She later realized were being made by her daughter,Iyanu. Yemi immediately lost balance and fell to the ground. "Run ,quick!" Bisi tearfully ordered Iyanu to go to the room and lock the door. Yemi stood up,after which He gave Bisi a very good beating.
Yemi and Bisi studied the same course in the same university but Yemi was 1 year ahead. He was head over heals for her but Bisi showed no iota of interest. He literally chased after her but was rejected several times. After graduation, they lost contact and went their separate ways. But as fate would have it,they met again at a friend's wedding function; they exchanged numbers and started communicating again.
Bisi had experienced a couple of failed relationships,Yemi also had his fair share. Since Bisi didn't have time on her side anymore and there were no other available suitors, she decided to give him a trial. " He must really love me, for him to still have feelings for me till now," she had thought. Yemi wasn't bad to look at,He was a tall,dark man with neatly shaved beards who had a steady job. Not long after,they got married and their union was blessed with 3 children, a boy and two girls.
Ayo was a free spirited child, very intelligent,loved cleanliness,enjoyed playing drums, having fun, making friends and above all,was very matured for his age. He loved food and it was an irony that he remained so slim. He was the first child of Yemi and Bisi. Though he smiled a lot, behind those smiles were pain and sadness. His father never liked him, he always wondered if he was adopted or was a product of his mother's extramarital affair. His father never smiled at him and when it came to issues concerning him,His father didn't care. This made him so afraid to ask anything from his father so he had to go through his mother to do so, because of this, he was closer to his mother and loved her so much. His mother was the most important person to him even though they fought a lot. His father hardly catered for the family's needs including payment of school fees on time,he preferred spending the money on women and alcohol . It got to a point Ayo decided to attend a public school because he got tired of being disgraced and sent home for school fees. As he grew older his hatred for his father grew, a major fuel to this was his violence towards his beloved mother.
He got so angry one day when he witnessed his father raising hands on his mother. He held his hands and shouted at him after which he angrily left the house. Family membets had to beg his way back into the house.
But there was one thing that baffled Ayo,amidst all this,his mother always put a smile on her face and never told anyone of her ordeal; She always pleaded with him not to hate his father for all he did; "Please dear,don't hold it against him", She always said. When he asked her why She was still in such an abusive marriage,She said ," So that you and your sisters won't grow without a father".
"Madam,you need to take things very easy,your blood pressure is 180/100mmHg,you need to be more judicious in taking your medication as well as relieve yourself from stress". Dr Tosin advised Bisi. Bisi had been diagnosed of hypertension for 3 years. Dr Tosin prescribed her medication,told her to get more rest and reduce her salt intake.
Bisi was surprised to see Yemi home so early. The whole living room was filled with the smell of liquor. Yemi asked where She was coming from,and Bisi told him She went to the hospital for checkup. Yemi said," Don't give me that bull shit,I know you went to see your boy friend,you slut." Bisi was so surprised and hurt,but replied," I am sure you had a long day, let me prepare your meal". Yemi said," You this witch,pretending to be a saint. I know you are the cause of my problems;you have never added value to my life,you are just a Pest". Anytime Yemi had a rough day and he drank a lot,He always blamed Bisi for misfortunes. Bisi didn't respond because She was already used to it. As She headed for the kitchen, Yemi held her tightly by her arm and whispered in a deadly voice," where do you think you are going? I am not done speaking." " Let go of me please, you are hurting me!" Bisi cried out but no one was at home to come to her aid. As She was trying to break free,She suddenly felt a tightness in her chest and started screaming;Yemi initially thought it was an act for him to let go,so he slapped her and pushed her to the ground. Bisi landed on the floor and didn't move,She laid there,helpless.. Yemi thought it was a joke,but when he got closer,he saw she was hardly breathing. He sobered up immediately and rushed her to the hospital. Bisi was declared dead some minutes after they arrived at the hospital,She died of cardiac arrest. She was just 48 years old.
Stay tuned for part 2,there we shall talk about the connection between prolonged violence and chronic medical conditions like hypertension.
