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I don't like being alone but circumstances force me to be alone tonight. I've asked several people who haven't booked a room and not all of them admitted that they have. Maybe it's not meant to be, recently I just got news that Mas Ibas has booked his own room. In fact, I usually call him, but today he disappeared after our event was over.

But he called me back later. Asked where I was sleeping with whom. I repeated a sentence that was like a mantra; "Like the title of a Paul Anka song, I don't like to sleep alone..."

I have a not-so-strong agenda tonight, namely going to Ambassador because I want to see suitable clothes. During the two nights in Bandung I didn't have time to buy anything. Don't let it be the same in Jakarta. In fact, it's not certain that I will go to Bandung again next year.

But because it was too late to leave the hotel, when I got there the Premium store was already closed. I tried to look at several shoe stores that were still open, but none of them suited me. After eating on the side of the road that made my throat itchy because of the oil, I decided to go home.

Leaving for Ambassador at past 8:00 p.m. was the first stupidity. There should have been no need to leave again because I could already estimate the situation there. Eating on the side of the road with oil that had been used many times was the second stupidity.

Then the third was buying medicine at Kimia Farma for Rp689,408 which was actually not that important. I had asked about similar medicine that was cheaper, but there was none. I should have turned right back, but I decided to buy it instead.

I didn't think critically about spending money because I was used to having money. In fact, when I wanted to buy hand body lotion for Rp400,000 in Banda Aceh, I went back and forth twice before finally deciding not to buy it. In fact, I have been using that environmentally friendly hand body lotion since 2003. However, if it costs Rp400,000 now, I would use more of that money to pay off my child's college fees or pay off my child's boarding house which still owes Rp5,000,000.

So, the problem is that increasing needs make me more critical in managing money. Then somehow the multivitamins that weren't really that important were bought? I can't explain it other than the feeling of having extra money.

As I walked back to my hotel room, I thought that if I invested the Rp689,408 in cryptocurrency, it would be more profitable after a few months.

December 2024 is still about 15 days away. I have to be more strict in spending every rupiah from my wallet. But more importantly, I have to work hard to get every rupiah from various sources, invest some and spend some.[]

Jakarta, December 16, 2024

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Kebodohan Mengalir tanpa Campur Tangan Pikiran dalam pengeluaran uang

Aku tidak suka sendiri tetapi keadaan memaksaku harus sendiri malam ini. Aku sudah bertanya ke beberapa orang siapa yang belum memesan kamar dan tidak semuanya mengaku sudah ada. Barangkali tidak berjodoh, belakangan baru dapat kabar Mas Ibas sudah memesan kamar sendiri. Padahal, aku biasanya menelepon dia, tapi hari ini dia menghilang setelah acara kami selesai.

Tapi dia balik meneleponku kemudian. Bertanya aku tidur di mana dengan siapa. Aku mengulang kalimat yang seperti mantra; “Seperti judul lagu Paul Anka, I don’t like to sleep alone…”

Aku memiliki agenda yang tidak terlalu kuat mala mini, yakni ke Ambassador karena ingin melihat pakaian yang cocok. Selama dua malam di Bandung tidak sempat membeli apa pun. Jangan sampai di Jakarta juga demikian. Padahal, belum tentu tahun depan aku akan ke Bandung lagi.

Tapi karena sudah terlambat keluar dari hotel, sampai di sana toko Premium sudah tutup. Aku mencoba melihat beberapa toko sepatu yang masih buka, tapi tidak ada yang cocok. Setelah makan di pinggir jalan yang membuat kerongkonganku gatal karena minyak, aku memutuskan pulang.

Berangkat ke Ambassador sudah pukul 20.00 lewat adalah kebodohan pertama. Harusnya tidak perlu berangkat lagi karena aku sudah bisa memperkirakan situasi di sana. Makan di pinggir jalan dengan minyak yang dipakai berkali-kali adalah kebodohan kedua.

Lalu yang ketiga ketiga membeli obat di Kimia Farma sampai Rp689.408 yang sbenarnya tidak terlalu penting. Aku sempat bertanya tentang obat sejenis yang lebih murah, tapi tidak ada. Harusnya langsung balik kanan, tapi aku malah memutuskan untuk membelinya.

Aku tidak berpikir kritis tentang pengeluaran uang karena sudah terbiasa punya uang. Padahal, ketika hendak membeli hand body seharga Rp400.000 di Banda Aceh, aku dua balik bolak-balik sebelum akhirnya kuputuskan untuk tidak membelinya. Padahal hand body yang ramah lingkungan itu, sudah kupakai sejak 2003. Namun kalau sekarang harganya Rp400.000, lebih banyak uang itu kupakai untuk menyicil uang kuliah anak atau menyicil rumah kos anak yang masih terutang Rp5.000.000 lagi.

Jadi, masalahnya kebutuhan yang semakin meningkat membuatku lebih kritis dalam mengelola uang. Lalu entah bagaimana kemudian multivitamin yang sebenarnya tidak terlalu penting, sampai terbeli? Aku tidak bisa menjelaskannya selain karena masih ada perasaan punya uang lebih.

Ketika berjalan pulang menuju kamar hotel, aku berpikir uang Rp689.408 itu kalau aku investasikan dalam cryptocurrency, akan lebih menguntungkan setelah beberapa bulan.

Desember 2024 masih tersisa sekutar 15 hari lagi. Aku harus lebih ketat mengeluarkan setiap rupiah dari dompet. Tapi yang lebih penting, aku harus bekerja keras mendapatkan setiap rupiah dari berbagai sumber, menginvestasikan sebagian dan membelanjakannya sebagian.[]

Jakarta, 16 Desember 2024

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