[Poem - With Audio] Inner Conflict

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The heart is heavy, inner pressure great,
The thoughts confused do not abate.
This inner turmoil no words can say,
They cannot express, neither can they convey,
This mad profusion of feelings does reign,
Holding my hurt, being my pain.

How can I release them, open the gate!
Suppressing no longer, erasing the slate,
Of my heart and my mind, yes my soul so long used,
Storing up all this anguish, I’ve been so abused.

And even within these words that I write,
I see my self-pity wrapped up oh so tight,
Entwining me with inexorable might,
Trapping me in a dark place without light!

What can I write! What can I say!
These damned words I’m writing so impotent lay.
Yes, I know now no words can ever reach me inside,
And draw out the secret things in there that hide.

These words a dim reflection of me are,
Only shadows of the truth, inadequate by far,
To comprehend my inner being,
Through words there really is no seeing!

The hidden depths, they’re hidden well,
Who can know them, who can tell?
What I feel inside at times like this,
Jumbled emotions, all seems amiss!

And yet I know what comes will pass, always the same,
Behold I’m whole, behold I’m lame!
I’ve yet to understand the why,
Just ride it out, from low to high.

Hurting will pass; anguish does go,
The steady state above the low,
Does come and keep me for a space.
Mad feelings then are but a trace…

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Note: I've been encouraged by some of the feedback I've gotten, so my plan is to continue re-posting poems from the last several months, but now including an audio clip going forward. I'll also be sprinkling in some new (or at least previously unpublished) poems here and there.