Plight of a sinner

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My lips are the dearest things to me right now
They are the only things that won't deceive me, ever;
They've been loyal to me when my eyes were not,
And even now they're not doing what my mind is trying to do.

I've been lying to myself and I've believed the lies,
That one day I'll change this lifestyle without telling no one,
But these lies have always remained on my wish list,
None of them have seen beyond the jotter in my room.

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I've walked out of here several times than not,
And I've still returned to this same old spot,
Back to this spot where I picked up the cigarette,
And tucked it between my soft, tender, innocent lips.

My humble pride keeps advising me "hold on, it's almost over",
But I remember it wasn't over because last night I still did it,
I know I'll see one day and won't see the following day,
But I see the end of life, I need an Angel now than ever.