Accepting your spouse part 1

I will discussing this morning accepting your spouse, you might have come across a prayer which goes like this "God grant me the courage to change the things I can change, the serenity to accept the things I cannot change and the wisdom to know the difference".
You know, I have discovered this about life that God has not given you control over everything but has given you control over somethings,when you try to control the things God has not given you power to control you have signed for frustration that is why the prayer is very important because what you can change God won't change for you.you have to change it,he put a responsibility on you to change it, the prayer says give me courage because that's what I need to change what I need to change what I have the power to change, said give me the serenity to accept what I cannot change and then importantly give me the wisdom to recognize what I can change and what I cannot change.

One thing that you can't change is the personality of your spouse but most people have not accepted that reality. See, people don't change in marriage. A whole lot of time we overlook many things when we fall in love before we get married, after we get married and we begin to Live together we live up close, somebody that we have never lived with all our lives up to that point then we begin to discover things ,we begin to now take notice of things we didn't take notice before,many times really some those things showed up before marriage some showed up well and some until after marriage, unconsciously before we realize it we have taken up a difficult assignment "I want to change my husband,I want to change my wife".

When the person you love and lived with makes it his or her assignments to change you,their is a message that is communicated to you and that is rejection, when somebody will not allow you to be who you are,will not allow you to be free to be you,you become unhappy,so I will say this, when we don't accept our spouses the way they are and give them the freedom the way they are we making them unhappy,an unhappy spouse will make you unhappy, so they are things about our spouses we should just accept those things are not going to change.

People are happy when they have the freedom to be themselves,you just accept them, it does means that they are perfect,it just mean that you make yourself comfortable with who that person is and give the person the freedom,even it will give you a peace of mind,making it your assignment to change your husband or to change your wife, you are given yourself a difficulty assignment you can't pass,in fact I will say this if you succeed in changing your spouse you won't like what you will get at the end of the day because some of the thing that you saw that attracts you in the first instants will have disappeared.

Acceptance in marriage, however, must be mutual. If both spouses don’t accept each other, they are going to be in a constant struggle. If your spouse has accepted you, but you haven’t learned to accept your spouse, think long and hard about the effect of your attitude on your spouse. It is draining to be around someone who is constantly dissatisfied with you. And it is irritating to have someone try to change who you fundamentally are. Instead of trying to change your spouse, consider growing up and changing yourself.

This is first challenge we all face in marriage and some people find it hard to cope with it and get frustrated, we must prepare our mind for this before going into marriage because we all have our differences, accepting your spouse just the way they are is important, you must work very hard on it. Thanks

All pictures used is from

I will like to say a very big thank you to my mentor @sirknight for the love he has showed all minnow,the support, the blessings and most of it all the development in skills of each parishioners. Thank you sir for everything.

Thanks for your time