In real life, few people dislike praise.

This is because in their hearts, the most basic need is the desire to be appreciated and recognized by others. When a person is praised by others, this desire is realized, so he will feel particularly happy and joyful.

In a word, praise makes people's vanity the most direct satisfaction!

The great writer Mark Twain once exaggeratedly admitted that a good compliment can make him live for two months without eating or drinking. The Russian writer Tolstoy said: "Even in the best, most friendly, and purest interpersonal relationship, praise and praise are also necessary, just as lubricants are necessary for wheels, which can make wheels turn faster."

Therefore, if you use more words of praise when communicating with others, you can often win the favor of others and earn yourself a reputation for "talking". However, compliments must also be measured. If you say too much, you will be flattering and flattering, and it will sound nauseous. If it is unremarkable, or even dry, it will not have the effect of praise.

For example, a mother praising her child: "You are a good child, and I am very pleased to have you." This kind of statement is very measured and will not make the child feel proud, but if the mother says: "You are really A genius, among the little children I have seen, none of them can catch up with you." That will lead the child to the path and make him (her) think that this is the case.

It can be seen that praise can neither be excessive nor plain.

It is common for people to appear inattentive when complimenting others, such as "you write this article quite well", "you look good in this dress", "you sing well" and so on. Such empty compliments can not only convey that the other party is happy. , Sometimes even because of your perfunctory disgust and dissatisfaction caused by others.

Therefore, compliment others should be as enthusiastic and specific as possible.

For example, to praise others for writing well, you can say something like: "Your article is really good, the language is beautiful, the story is vivid, especially in the portrayal of the characters, it is very good.

Praising others for their beautiful clothes, you can say: "Your dress is so good-looking. The style and color match are just right. It fits you perfectly.

To praise others for singing well, you can say: "You sing really well, you have a beautiful style, and your voice is very magnetic.

Praising others is a communication skill, not just a few nice compliments. In fact, there are certain principles and techniques for praising others, and the result of "exporting random praise" will only be counterproductive. At the same time, you can't praise others too much. Only moderate praise will make people feel comfortable, otherwise it will make people feel embarrassed, disgusted, or feel that you are flattering. Specifically, the following principles need to be grasped:

1. Attitude must be sincere.

Everyone cherishes sincerity, which is the most important yardstick in interpersonal communication. The same is true for complimenting others. If your compliment is not from your sincerity, the other party will not accept this compliment, or even doubt your intentions. So when praising others, in order to avoid similar misunderstandings, you must make sure that the person you are praising "is true" and have a good reason to praise him. For example, a beautiful lady you are familiar with, you can say to her: "You are so beautiful." Then she might appreciate your compliments to her. But if you say this to a lady who is not good looking, it may arouse her resentment.

A sincere compliment should have the following characteristics:

• The tone should be warm and lively, not like an endorsement.
• Be brief, plain, fluent and smooth, and speak what you usually say.
• Be creative and praise what others can't praise.

Unless you are sincerely complimenting, don't praise others. Otherwise, false compliments can only make people feel that you are mocking or jealous of others. But if you have to be insincere, then at least it sounds and looks sincere.

2. The wording must be accurate and appropriate.

When praising others, don’t use ambiguous statements, but be accurate. Some people seem to think that vague praise is better than silence. In fact, vague praise is often worse than insulting words. Things like "Hmm...it's kind of interesting", "Very good" and "Not so bad" will only be offensive.

3. The timing must be mastered.

Praise others also depends on the timing, the timing is wrong, no matter how clever praise it will be counterproductive. For example, when the other party is in a particularly low mood, or has other things that are unpleasant, excessive compliments often make the other party feel unreal. At this time, we must pay attention to the other party's feelings. "Based on your own feelings" is a good way. Everyone has a keen sense and can feel the other person's feelings at the same time. Believe in your own feelings and use it appropriately in compliments. If we understand our inner world, and often praise others, we believe that our interpersonal relationship will get better and better.

In short, praise must adhere to certain principles, grasp certain techniques, and do not praise indiscriminately anytime, anywhere. The most wise speaking is to say the words of compliment without revealing them and to the point.