She Thought A Spider Landed On Her In The Shower, And We Can't Stop Laughing

in #funny7 years ago (edited)
Our imagination can get the best of us. Take this woman for instance, who was showering and thought a spider had joined her for a quick rinse.

       

"so this morning I jumped in the shower and decided to scrub my hair. I have very long and curly hair that reaches halfway down my lower back. however, as soon as its wet the curls straighten out and my hair almost reaches my bum.

so hair is moist, shampooing executed and I just need to rinse. I tip my head returned and turn my hair over my shoulder all shampoo ads everywhere. and sense something brush against the top of my bum. being the mature and logical gal I'm, I got here to the one and simplest viable end.

spider.

with a scream a howler monkey could be pleased with, boobs flying and looking like a few sorts of the demented mermaid, I tried to escape the shower stall. and right away obtained a new skill; the capacity to do the splits.

this in itself turned into a magnificent feat of physics as there isn't clear enough room in my bathroom for a little one to do the splits, with no way-thoughts a 5'9" 1/2 drowned rat. as a result, while my leading foot came into contact with the bathroom pedestal my frame become launched again alongside the ground toward the shower. this left me wedged between the toilet and the shower tray.

in which I was  b*tch-slapped through the shower door.

one ride to a&e later and I have a sprained ankle, a fractured ankle, two broken feet, a lovely rainbow of bruises in a few thrilling places and a partridge in a pear tree.

TL, dr: upon getting to know that my hair now reaches my bum I; performed gymnastics worth of Rio, made the laws of physics my b*tch and took a guided excursion of the neighborhood hospital."