SEC17 WK#5: Caring for aged and dependent relatives in the family

I joined this contest upon the invitation of Mr. @alee75, who shared a touching story about his parents. However, this time around, I won't be sharing about my own parents as part of the "aged" category. Instead, I'd like to talk about my maternal grandparents.

_{This is my granny while she is blessing the celebration of my cousin's circumcision. This photo is from my private collection}

My family and I reside in a suburban area where the prevailing values tend to blend modernity with the timeless wisdom passed down by our ancestors. Here, many elders remain active and healthy, 'cause their diligent efforts in maintaining their well-being from a young age. In fact, many social events in our village are spearheaded by the elderly.

My own grandmother holds a "revered" position as a traditional elder in our community. She's frequently called upon to bless sacred occasions like weddings, baby showers, childbirths, and even more solemn events such as mourning rituals lasting 7, 30, or even 100 days after someone's passing. Alongside two other revered elders in our village, she's among the last practitioners of "peusijuk," a local Acehnese tradition aimed at warding off misfortune through blessings.

This tradition involves special prayers recited by the elders while sprinkling a concoction of specific leaves gathered into a bouquet. These leaves typically include turmeric (Curcuma longa), Kalanchoe pinnata, and other herbal foliage.

Whenever a member of our community moves into a new home, they call upon my grandmother to bless it to ensure protection from both human and supernatural disturbances. It is similar to any new vehicle purchase undergoes a similar blessing ritual, accompanied by prayers for safe travels and smooth operation.

Unfortunately, my mommy opposes these blessing practices, creating a slight rift as she believes they contradict her own beliefs. This disagreement has caused a bit of friction between her and my grandmother. Yet, deep down, they both acknowledge their mutual love and respect as mother and daughter.

My grandmother battles type 2 diabetes. She has a penchant for carb-loaded foods, but her consistent intake of diabetes medication has kept severe symptoms at bay throughout her life. My mother is always there whenever my grandmother needs her, even though they don't live under the same roof. Our house is just a few hundred meters away from my grandmother's, and it's close to all our other relatives as well.

Meanwhile, my grandfather is also unwell. Over the past few months, he's been experiencing bouts of unconsciousness and impulsive behavior whenever his condition flares up. However, once the symptoms subside, he has no recollection of his actions. Our family has consulted a neurologist regarding his condition, but so far, they haven't been able to pinpoint what's happening with my grandfather. The doctor mentioned that his symptoms don't seem to match those of Alzheimer's or dementia to such an extent.

_{The elderly man in the long white shirt is my grandfather when he was still healthy. Meanwhile, that girl behind him sitting alone, barely visible, is me. LOL}

A few years back, my grandfather fell from the roof while repairing it. He used to be incredibly active, even at his age of around 70. He was the handyman of his own house. Unfortunately, the accident left him temporarily paralyzed. As he went through the recovery process, he started exhibiting the symptoms I just mentioned.

What amazed me, though, is how my grandmother never excessively burdened her children, despite having five of them living nearby. She'd only call them in emergencies.

Their love for their parents was undeniable that almost every day, one of them would take care of my grandparents at their home. Some were in charge of preparing their favorite meals, while others handled utility bills. Those with less financial means contributed with their energy, assisting my grandparents with laundry, house cleaning, and always being ready to drive them wherever they wanted to go. My grandmother would get angry if anyone helped them, even their own children and grandchildren. Yet her children would get even angrier if their help was refused LOL.

_{The adorable grandchildren at the same event. They are wearing traditional Acehnese attire to liven up the occasion}

Observing my grandmother, I'm convinced that truly loving parents don't want to burden their children, even when they themselves are in dire need of assistance. Perhaps that's what people mean by true independence. Because when we talk about independence in the younger generation, it's commonplace. What's extraordinary is when, in a situation where we must rely on others, we choose to remain self-sufficient.