How to build a healthy relationship with money in 7 single steps (or how not to end up broke and depressed)

Have you ever experienced the feeling of not being able to provide for your family?

I'm sure that most of you know this feeling. Even if you have a solid job or a somewhat successful running business, at some point in your life you must have felt this way

When did you feel this way?

Maybe it was something as simple as wishing to give a little something to your girlfriend, kids, wife, mother, etc., something you knew would bring an instant smile to their lips and then, not having enough money to do this

Or maybe, it was something way more important and urgent. Perhaps until this point, you thought you had everything under control and then reality hit you and an emergency happened. An accident, illness, or perhaps catastrophic damage to your property

At this point, you finally realized that your approach regarding money was all wrong. You either had a loose grasp of how basic it was for being able to live a decent life, thought that it was "the source of all evil" or maybe you simply had a bad relationship with money

What do I mean with "a bad relationship with money"?

First of all, I should try to explain to you what I understand that money is and what it isn't, and the simplest way to do this is by asking you a question

What does it mean to be rich?

"Having lots of money!"

Wrong!!!

First of all, you must consider that "money" comes in different forms. Most of you reading this are used to use hard currency (US dollars, Euros or British pounds) as your everyday money form, but in a high inflation economy, having large sums of money in the bank ready to be spent means losing money every day. And I'm not even going to mention what might happen if the entity that issues this currency (a government or central bank, etc) fails

Here is the thing, unless you mean like "billions" when you say "lots of money", no matter how much money you have in the bank or under your mattress, if you think you are rich and then you spend exactly like you think a rich person would, then you will end up broke

Why? Because you have money but you don't have an income

So, what does it really means to be rich?

It means having an income large enough so money stops being a problem to live the life you want to live

Does this mean that being rich will make you happy?

That's not what I'm saying. What I'm saying is that by having money, being poor will NOT be your excuse to live a sad, shitty life. You might have another excuse but money will not be it

I know what you're thinking right now: "Hey man, you said you would tell us what money is and what it isn't"

Well, I can tell you this: Money IS a tool, money ISN'T valuable by itself

I know, you have been told the opposite. You were taught since you were really young that money is something really valuable but if you think about it deeply, we trade really valuable things (time, effort, jewelry, real state properties, cars, etc.) for pieces of paper, isn't that weird?

"Well, those pieces of paper you receive for your work or for whatever you are able to sell can buy you some other valuable things, therefore, money is valuable, right?"

Think about it again

It's not the money itself that has intrinsic value, it's WHAT YOU CAN PAY FOR with that money that has it

Money my friend is then, just a tool to gather the value of your time and effort so you can trade it for goods and services you might need or want later

Knowing this, the main idea I want to get into your brain is this:
People use tools, not the other way around, right?

THEN WHY DO YOU LET MONEY USE YOU INSTEAD OF THE OPPOSITE?

Why do you let it dictate your emotions?

Life without it can be really tough but just as grabbing a girl by her shoulders and then crying and screaming for her to love you will not get you any closer to your goal, crying and screaming that you want money won't get you any

Have you ever given money to somebody just because they asked for it? Maybe to a friend or family member going through difficult times, a beggar, to charity or to someone that you really felt at the time that needed more than you did

But how about giving money to someone you don't know? To someone that looks just as healthy and capable to get a job as you do but doesn't even bothers to offer you a SOLUTION for some problem in exchange for our money?

My best guess is that you haven't... and you won't, because you think it's ridiculous for anybody to ask for your money in that situation. And you would look ridiculous too if you did the same

This is why you must understand that even when money has no value by itself, the only way to get some is to give something of value in exchange for it

It can be your time, your effort or your skills. You must provide a solution to someone else's problem

So... In a wrap, what should you consider to build a positive relationship with money?

1. Money is basic to live a decent life
   It doesn't matter how spiritual are your priorities in life, you still have to pay for rent
2. Don't hate the rules, just play the game
   Money isn't dirty or the source of all evil just because you don't have any, there are so many good things you can do with it
3. Real riches come from income, not your bank account balance
   Money flows just as water in a river, if the stream that feeds it stops, the river will run dry and so will your pockets
4. It doesn't have value by itself
   It's a tool and you should learn to use it on your favor
5. Don't let it control your emotions
   Passion is a key factor to succeed at anything in life, but money is a numbers game and usually follows those who make sound rational decisions
6. You must trade value in exchange for it
   If you can buy value with money this means that you should be able to sell value in exchange for value
7. Become a problem solver
   And what does "value" means? Being able to solve someone else's problem. The bigger and more painful this problem is, the bigger the amount of money people will be willing to pay you for solving it

THE END

In case you are reading this, I hope this text can be helpful to you in any way

This is just me, taking a few of my own REAL ideas about this subject from the top of my head and trying to build it as mindset advice regarding money and value. I think that with a few adjustments this could be turned into a sales letter for some book or course on the subject

Any advice on your part (as a piece of writing) would be welcome

Thanks in advance!
Johan