Take a moment to breathe, and notice the environment around you. Herein you will find some reflections about writing, steemit, and balance.

lol, sorry, couldn't resist..

(Participating in) social media is new to me.

Between concerns about privacy and conclusions drawn from observing the behaviors of others who heavily consume social media, it always seemed wiser to not have anything to do with it.

Steemit has changed that, to a small degree, with unexpected rewards and some pitfalls --

It begins

It was not makeup tutorial level (#steememe), but steemit has treated me well so far.

I am humbled and fortunate that two of my recent posts ("Bringing Bitshares to a Wider Audience" and "HACKMOAR") got some traction.

This has certainly encouraged me to spend more time around writing and creating content for the benefit of the community - and my own, given that knowledge of the subjects being written about is bound to become deeper from all the necessary research, thinking and fact-checking that necessarily go along with the process of creating the content.

Even at this stage a few things were already out of balance - skipping the daily meditation here and there, not going for a run because I wanted to "not miss anything" happening on steemit, eating in a hurry to go on "not missing anything" ...

It was nothing too serious and I kept telling myself that tomorrow I would get things back to balance again (a warning sign that I should have recognized).

Impressed by the positive feedback the first post had, I could not sleep until much later than usual, my brain lit up, thinking about what to write about next, what do I really have to say, how to write it in the most authentic way possible, and the interplay of that and what is most likely to be of value for the community here.

And here begins the cautionary tale that I would like to share with all of you.

Old friends in town

A few old friends from my birthplace happened to be visiting a nearby city.

They contacted me the afternoon after publishing HACKMOAR, before I knew the attention it was receiving.

The plan was to meet in town mid/late-afternoon and then camp overnight in the forested hills nearby.

We had missed each other a couple of months ago, when I visited my hometown for a few days, before setting off exploring a hiking trail (of some 500km) that I had been meaning to explore for some years now.

So, enthusiastically, I confirmed.

HACKMOAR soars

After coming back from some spectacular summer cycling under 35º C (highly recommended, but take plenty of water :-)), and before starting to get ready to head into town, I (arguably) made the mistake of turning on the computer, and check how things were going.

As it turned out, it was doing quite well!

Even though there was no one around here, I instinctively dropped my jaw and covered the mouth with my right hand, like saying.. "holy f...!"

A few moments later it was obvious that my thoughts were all over the place, dozens of them firing to random directions, all of them 1000x faster than usual.

I had to regain composure.
Something had to be done.

Looking within

As I turned my attention inwards, there was a moderately strong sense of stimulation present - more than what a cup of espresso usually delivers to me.

Besides some residual disbelief, I also detected thought loops: they basically amounted to "you have to do this, look at those numbers, you have to do more of this, screw everything else"

Furthermore, there was a very distinct desire to call my friends to cancel our plans, and stay home writing.

Instead, I decided to grab my trustworthy meditation pillow, and I sat down.

The meditation

This session was greatly hindered by the stimulation present: I had to repeatedly bring my attention back to the breath, as it relentlessly - and illusively - escaped back to thoughts of "write more, make more $$$, wow profits"

While I was not alarmed (if anything the situation amused me, because such thoughts were so out of character - I'm as chilled as they come), it did not take long to realize that letting such vicious and loopy thoughts grow (which was bound to happen if they were to continue to be present) would very quickly bring imbalance to my life.

Upon deeper introspection, I understood the problem.

It was not greed (ok, maybe a little bit of that too - but mostly --), it was FOMO.

Concluding the meditation

As I continuously took note when I realized that my awareness was once again diverted to thoughts of becoming Scrooge McDuck, interleaved with the fear of missing out, and having to act now or lose in on the action (and profit), a gradual awareness manifested, that the thoughts I was experiencing were coming from a scarcity mindset.

It took consciously calming the mind to realize this.

Once that milestone was achieved, it was possible to see through the muddy water (all the scattered and fast thoughts).

At that point, a growing serenity emanated.

I felt calmer again. And the sped-up thoughts all but dissipated.

I saw then clearly the error in the thoughts, the assumption that if I do not get all of it in yesterday (preferably), then others will instead, and it will be them reaping the benefits.

It is not like this at all, and that is what I would like to share with you today.

The meditation - final words

As the Tibetan bells rang (yeah, there is an app to time the meditation - modernities...), I opened my eyes, took a few unhurried deep breaths, and slowly stood up.

I came to realize there was an addiction component to the situation as well.

As it happens, others appear to have noticed the same.

If we are acting semi-automatically and in a compulsive way, this is not good. We are letting our thoughts take over our awareness of the present moment, and we become zombies, slaves to the thoughts, instead of masters.

The antidote is mindfulness (non-affiliate link, highly recommend the book.. I re-read this one a couple of times a year).

Be present. The scattered thoughts go away, and trust me, you will be happier and more grounded this way.

Conclusion

Practical

Needless to say, immediately after finishing the meditation, I went for a shower and then headed into town.

It was wonderful to see my friends again, and we had a really special night in the forest.

true story..

There was a giant fire, delicious food, a vaguely nervous dog, singing and guitars playing, and finally a very welcoming silence in the darkness of a clear-skied summer night.

Philosophical

To all of us who want to contribute to steemit, let's keep in mind that there is enough for everyone.

If we write for anything else than just writing, then we are doing ourselves and everyone else a great disservice.

It cannot be rushed.

The water needs time to boil, the food takes time to digest, a child takes time to grow, the sun rises and sets just at the right time.

So it must be with our writing. Only from this place can we be our most authentic selves.

All we have to do to receive value, is to provide value to others.

If what we are saying matters, then it can wait a day - it will still matter.

(It is not about procrastination that I write about here, of course - the perceptive reader will know this)

And it is, after all, by being true to our-ever-evolving-selves that our best writing will manifest. This we cannot do if all we do is revolve around steemit - in no time we will be a caricature of our former selves.

Final words

One of my friends had a baby a year ago, and she brought her as well.

As I held this tiny creature in my arms and looked around, seeing my old friends, all of us once again together like so many times before, I could not help but chuckle and think to myself:

"And to think that even for a split second you thought about not coming because of steemit!!"

I smiled at her, as I held her tiny little hand, and she smiled back.

There is no SteemUSD in the world worth more than that.

Epilogue

This post started its conception yesterday evening.

Yesterday morning (still in the forest), occasionally the thought of having to hurry back and write, sporadically showed up.

Do you see what it does? It takes you away from the moment, and into your head, where this thought is attempting to grab your awareness so that it can survive.

Every single time, I acknowledged that it was present, and let it go.

ok, maybe it did not look like this at all

We went for lunch in town after spending most of the morning talking and soaking in the sun.

There, after eating and saying goodbye to my friends, I saw a beautiful young woman, and struck up a conversation with her.

She seemed to like me enough to want and go to a nearby park and spend some time together.

For whatever reason, it did not progress past pleasant conversation, but the point stands: had I heeded the thought of coming back to write in the morning, there would have been no lunch with old friends, and I would have not met this beautiful young woman.

We exchanged contacts, and rather than a lover, I may have found myself a new friend - time will tell.

---

It was yet another spectacular sunny day, and I decided to walk back home (35 kilometers).

After dinner and shower, that is when I begun writing.

About an hour later, realizing once again there was some hurry in getting this done for reasons other than writing, I stopped, took a deep breath, and suspended the computer.

I forgot all about writing, sat down by the piano, and got lost in the music.