Why some many people don't reach their full potential? ( Top 20 reasons why we don't fight for our dreams)

We only have one life. ONE!! And that is it! So it would make sense that everyone would try to live it to the fullest by following their dreams. However I find that some people don’t.

But if you ask anyone if they would like to reach their full potential, I believe everyone would say yes. So what is stoping us? What are the conditions necessary to make the transition from your current life to the best version of it and the best version of yourself.

What causes us to conform when we should be moving forward with excitement every. The only conditions necessary is for you to be alive, really that’s is all it takes for you to move towards your vision. Specially considering that we are in the 21º century and specially if you live in a first world country. That’s all you need, but if that is all you need then there must be something blocking the road.

First of all let me make clear that this is not a “fell goody”, “motivational” article. My intent is not to give you some low grade pop psychology like so many “self help gurus” do. I am not here to say that you can do anything and that everything will be fine no matter what. Nor am I here to give you some vague, general and pseudo spiritual tips like many “spiritual gurus” this days. This is a very pragmatic look, based on research and real life examples, at the top reasons why we don’t “chase our dreams”.

So… Let’s have a look at the top 20 reasons that cause us to stagnate.

#1 Fear of Failure!

This is one of the most common ones.

No matter how developed and sophisticated you are, no matter what you have already achieved, at some point in your life you have experience some sort of fear of failure. While it is normal to have it at some point it is not necessary nor helpful.

As Benjamin Franklin liked to say: “Momentary failure is not permanent defeat”. And this is exactly the problem. We tend to see momentary failure as permanent defeat.

In our contemporary culture we are used to look magazines covers with reality Tv performers smiling on them or with the 20 something internet millionaire or the 20 something pop start and we believe that, that is it. Not only we believe in overnight success but we think that is the norm and we compare ourselves to others. So we look for magic beans, easy solutions in our pill society. We condition ourselves to fear failure because if we fail, we are losers and our lives are over…

If you are going to do something meaningful with the time you have on earth, you need to have long term thinking. The expression goes: “ People over estimate what they can do in a year and underestimate what they can do in 5”.

Anything worth doing takes time and dedication. To chase your dream and reach your full potential is a enormous task, and you can be sure that you will have momentary failure. What you need to do is find that one occupation that you are willing to fail several times and still have total dedication and motivation for it.

If you study the lives of extremely successful and creative people you will see that they all failed numerous times.

Thomas Edison had tried 1000 times to create a light bulb before actually succeeding in making one . When asked how he felt about having failed so many times, his reply was: I did not failed, I found 999 ways how not to make light bulbs, I only needed one way to make it work. And yes… you guessed how the story ends…. we have light bulbs now.

Ford had caused a factory to close, nobody wanted to work with him and almost did not found the funds to set up shop. Mozart almost stayed in his home town working for a third grade orchestra. And the list goes on and on…

Failure is actually good, if you fail it means you put in the time and energy into something. It means you tried. It is like being wrong, some people have a problem admitting they are wrong, but in doing so you are growing, you are learning and opening your mind for new ideias and possibilities.

The only thing to fear is inaction, that in turn is created by fear of failure.

#2 Stuck in Comfort!

This is a dangerous and sneaky one.

Comfort can boost the levels of laziness and conformity to extravagant levels. Like the bird that does not leave the cage when it is open. Some people need to hit rock bottom to start to change, some need to lose a lot to appreciate what they have. Comfort can be extremely seductive. “Yes it would be nice, to go and do all the things I want to do and get a better life, but you know… I have a job”

if I am on the couch, felling cozy under the blanket, watching a nice movie and munching some snacks, my body will find excuses and reasons for me not to go to the gym like I had planed. And it can be nice to fell comfortable and all for a while but it won’t bring you true joy. It is a bit similar to material possessions, we might think that this particular object will make us happy and we might get some satisfaction the moment we buy it, but if your soul is not content, if you are not happy or if you are not working towards your goal… it will all fell bleak in a couple of weeks.

Beware of comfort.

#3 It is not me!

A shield disguised as ego.

“ Yes, do all that I should be doing, create a great life… yes it sounds nice, but that is not for me” Basically this atitude is nothing but an excuse. We think that we are not the go get type A personality and we should just stay comfortable on the couch.

First of all, this is ego related and if there is one thing about ego is that it should be checked and many times ignored . Now a days people love to say me, it’s me, myself and I and my things. But that identity we treasure so much is really nothing more than a series of experiences and choices mixed with genetics. So we can change, evolve and adapt.

We must realize this … growth is only natural. So even if you really are not the type of person to fight for your vision, you can and will become one, if you start fighting.

It is easy to say “it’s not me” , you avoid failure and you have a good excuse for yourself… it reminds me when I was in school ( unfortunately I was a bad student) and the teachers would constantly ask me why I didn’t study… my answer was “It is just me… I’m not smart enough” This was nothing but a defence mechanism in order for them to leave me alone. ( and guess what?… It didn’t work)

So this is it for the first part on this series. Hope you enjoyed and was somewhat useful.

Stay tuned for the next chapters good stuff coming this way.