And so... Sam Sung

I entered the room and walked over to the good lady who was sitting on the sofa reading her Kindle. Gently I reached over and took the Kindle from her hands.

Put that away, lass.

I said, smiling.

Eh, what? Why?

The good lady looked a bit peeved, she must have been at a good bit of her book.

Put it away. You won't need to read books where we are going.

Oh God, it's happened, hasn't it? You have gone full-on cult and decided to kill us all, haven't you?

She looked both fearful and relieved that her bounteous man-chap had come to take this cruel burden of living from her.

I smiled, closing her Kindle and reaching out to clasp her hand.

It's better than that, baby. I'm taking you to the top.

She looked utterly confused now.

The top? The top of what?

She asked, giving me that sideways look you give a dog that you are trying to take a chewy toy from.

I waved about at our rubbish house and even more rubbish furniture as if it hurt my eyes.

Fucking everything, baby girl. You deserve it. Hell, we deserve it.

She looked at me more closely now. A worried look flitting across her features like a small woodland creature that has heard the flap of an owl's wing.

You aren't making much sense, Daddy-Bear?

Now she clasped my hand. Concern in her voice.

Oh really?

I stood and put a hand proudly on my hip, the other I held out as if cupping a giant solitary testicle.

You know my Steemit habit, don't you? You are always wittering on about the time I spend on my phone, Steeming.

The good lady nodded. I tittered slightly and continued.

What if I told you that Steemit had been bought by Samsung. Huh, what would you think of that?

I finished on a triumphant note and lifted my foot up, placing it on the small table like a lion-headed God in front of his people.

She made a face as she digested this news as if she was sooking the giblets from a chicken's carcass with a cheap plastic straw.

Really? Would we get a discount on our next Television?

Now it was my turn to look a bit confused.

What? Erm, well, maybe. But it's better than that...

What could be better than that!?

She countered incredulously.

I took a big deep breath in and then let it out majestically.

The Moon, baby. Remember I promised you the Moon once?

Her face lit up.

Oh God, yes. I do remember. When all the crypto was worth a fortune!! How could I forget!

I made a catching falling spaghetti motion beside my ears.

Well, hold on to your hat, baby. We are going to the moon, GUARANTEED!

She looked as if she was about to faint with joy now.

Is it really true? How can you know if it is really true?

I knelt before her, taking one of her hands again. I looked at her with my most sincere eye.

Trust me, baby. It must be true...

I nodded with the certainty of my words.

A man on the Internet said so...