Once, when I was about 8 years old, I bought a clicky pencil in school, and because it was purple, a girl wanted it, told the teacher it was hers and that I stole it. The teacher believed her because why would a boy want a girly, purple pencil? So I lost my pencil to her.

You remind me of that girl.

In case it's not a clear metaphor, once again:

• You never bought that pencil
• You never owned that pencil
• You never earned that pencil
• You only want it because I have it and it's a pretty colour.