What you're feeling Van Reybrouck called in his book Against Elections, Democratic Fatigue Syndrome. That draining feeling that even when you're asked for a choice it really doesn't matter on the long run. Its usually choosing between two less evils.
As to when do I think we lost companionship/comradery, I suspect it was with the baby boom generation. High pressure on individuality gave room to selfishness.
We've gone from parents giving the kid a spanking when he failed a class to parents beating up a lecturer because he failed a kid.