Emotional CAN be a good thing
Is being emotional a bad thing?
Steemians I wrote often about positivity and why I think it is key in life to avoid anger and negativity. I even wrote that it is important to control your emotions - I am still a supporter of the positive thing - I am not sure on the emotions part since some weeks. Some of you have read my recent post about my failures on steemit. This was a post clearly demonstrating that it is not easy for me at least to control emotions. I am for sure an emotional guy. What I learned from Friday's post where some good things - in a nutshell:
Steemit has potential - here is why?
- No spam comment on my post
- More views than votes (good!)
- Real and open comments
- A variety of different people and opinions
- Honest feedback
Thanks to the social behaviour of this community - why?
Honestly I expected negative feedback on the post or simply votes without reading. I was positively surprised by the comments and direct messages I received on Steemit.chat, Discord, Facebook, WhatsApp, SMS, WowApp. The aspect I consider is being important on Steemit is the social platform one, by that I mean real interaction. The good thing I learned have been comments by people I never talked or missed before. I did not expect this and appreciate it a lot. I think I saw again how important it is to break out from your common path or circle. Everyone has his circle of friends, people with common interests etc - this is a normal human thing. But only staying in this environment s maybe helping your reward wise but you miss so many good things out there.
Emotions can sound negative - but they are no weakness like harmony and positivity
There are a lot people that dislike when you are emotional and are aiming towards positivity and harmony. Some even call this stupid, weak and more. I learned this week even more that is totally a personal thing. Humans are different. This is the good thing. Everyone needs to decide on their own way of life. Therefore being totally brain controlled, data driven and unemotional is not per se a bad thing. I am not a psychologist so leave this up to experts to tell me if i am good, bad or just rubbish.
It is important you are yourself - do not let anyone manipulate you towards anything you do not want to! I am not planning to let anger dominate me - I have gone through such phases in life as well as on social media - last Friday was such a day with three events that made me very emotional all together. I did regret it quite soon but now think this is good, let your emotions flow - this is also important for your physical health.
Some advise how to control anger in particular - the negative emotional part below - wrote about that earlier.
Anger is a normal, healthy emotion. It can become unhealthy when it flares up all the time or spirals out of control. Chronic, explosive anger can have serious consequences for your health and your state of mind.
There are certain techniques how to get anger under control - everyone also on steemit can learn to keep their temper from hijacking their steemit life.
1) Explore what's behind your anger
Your childhood and education plays a crucial role to identify where anger problems stem from. Past experience include watching family members scream, throw things, hit each other. So traumatic events and also stress can make you more susceptible to anger as well.
2) Be aware anger warning signs and triggers
Usually there are physical signs of warning before you explode. Anger is a normal physical response. It is important to learn about your own personal signs that your temper is starting to boil. Knowing this helps to manage anger before it gets out of control.
3) Learn methods to cool down
Going a bit into detail on this point which is an important one. This can help you to act quickly to deal with your anger before it spins out of control.
- Take some deep breaths. Deep, slow breathing helps counteract rising tension. The key is to breathe deeply from the abdomen, getting as much fresh air as possible into your lungs.
- Exercise. A simple walk around the block is a good idea to release pent-up energy. This help to approach a situation with a cooler head.
- Use your senses. Take advantage of the relaxing power of your senses - e.g. listen to music, cook something etc
- Slowly count to ten. Focus on the counting to let your rational mind catch up with your feelings. If this does not help - do it again
4) Give yourself a reality check - ask yourself AFTER you cooled down!
- How imporant is this issue for my life?
- Is it worth to get angry about it?
- Is it worth to ruin the remainder of the day ?
- Is my response appropriate to the situation?
- Is there anything I can do about it?
- Is taking action worth my effort?
Sources: About Life Issues, Helpguide.com, Psychologie Heute, Psychology Today, Pixabay
Hope everything is back on the floating line my friend ;)
I am on the way towards this, thanks @alexvan - now raining cats & dogs here which does not help lol, but sure you see the same currently when looking out of the window or you are in the middle of it. Thanks for your support.
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First of all, I'm happiest to read this article!
I had no doubt that you would reconsider your last one, now it feels great to see that you're back on track.
Being emotional means "being human", so I can't see anything wrong about it. Keep being yourself because that's the way we like you, Uwe!!! (virtual hug)
Lucky you! How did you get there? Need some tips 😉
In my last article there are 80% spam comments. I have no interest in flagging these people and wasting my valuable voting power, but it's really annoying... (talking about emotions).
Enjoy your Sunday eve my friend!!!
I have found myself to be pleasantly surprised seeing people i didn't know or talk to leaving constructive comments on my posts. You are definitely limiting yourself to stay or focus on a relatively narrow subject matter. Good to broaden your horizon and see other views
Thanks and agreed. I will get better, the plan is here, the implementation in the making, if we only had moe than 24 hours a day but i will sure give that a go! Thanks for commenting @chelsea88
You'll get there! Little by little
I agree that there is nothing wrong with emotions and you hit the nail on the head by distinguishing between positive and negative emotions. As someone who has lived with negative emotions it is hard to understand what positive emotion feels like. I don't think it is possible to get rid of these negative thoughts but one can learn to live with them.
Nice article @uwelang. Your point about exercise is very important. So many people today lead sedentary lives and this can cause a build up of stress and even lead to depression.
I try to avoid getting angry about things that don't really matter. There are people actively trying to harm others in this world and that makes me angry. The troubles of Steemit are no more than an annoyance. We see greed and selfishness here, but nobody gets injured, part from their pride.
I believe most people are fundamentally good, but self-interest is a powerful force.
Just don't give in to the dark side.
This is very well said and a good analysis, you are totally right with it. The dark side is what we all should really avoid :-)
Good to read this post. Emotions can be a driver for actions. Although we shall control these (generally), it is good to feel them and from time to time let them go as well, like you did here on Steemit. Your frustrations are very similar to mine, and I had them almost from my start at Steemit. Somehow I got peace with how Steemit works - so it seems so - and only spend time on Steemit when I like to do so. This resulted in (much) less time on Steemit, less posts, less interactions, feeding the circle of less views on next posts - HOWEVER, I do still engage and keep contact with those Steemians I like, like you! The glass is half full versus the glass is half empty thing :) Looking forward to the future with you still here :)
Thanks buddy, i feel honoured about that. WE need to handle some communities when they come.
Hi @uwelang, I just stopped back to let you know your post was one of my favourite reads and I included it in my Steemit Ramble. You can read what I wrote about your post here.
If you’d like to nominate someone’s post just visit the Steemit Ramble Discord
Oh Love you!!!! Thanks so much @shadowspub
Why thank you ... nice work @uwelang
I sure am glad to hear that you will not be leaving, even though you never used those words. I find myself getting more emotional over Reading Post then I would if you would say it to my face no. I think mostly because I can read it over and over and over, creating a bigger impact. I have had to step back and when I want to make a nasty or snarky comment, I write it down and save it for a day or two because I have been bitten by the enter button. I agree with your psychology on controlling temper and I am agreeable with any means that it takes to keep it there. Thank you for addressing this situation because it really does affect many people. I'm happy to see you found a resolution and that wall will be well in your world. Where would be without our dance man?
That's a very good article ....so....does it mean you are back?
I tried to reflect my inner feelings - i never really said I leave, i expressed this a bit like that as of the news i got together within one hour on Friday. How could i ever leave this place which is my second home, where i enjoy real interaction no matter what it gets rewarded. My emotions sometimes hit me too much, sometimes I think i am a girl in the positive sense of the meaning :-). Thanks for your kind support @mammasitta
I am confused now because I remember that your subject line was a "good bye" but now it speaks only about your failures. Anyhow I am glad your reflection guided your emotions and you expressed them so well in this article. You might be right about girlie girls but not all girls are moody. I do know more men with those emotional swings than women unless they go through menopause or PMS 🙀😜🙄
Sometimes when we get angry we need to stop, think twice and react much later and not right away. Write it out but don't push that enter button. #justsaying
I hear you - the subject was "Bye" (i changed now) and in the post i said i decide when to leave - you are right i spoke about my failures in depth only - which was part of the emotional element. I am happy to have people like you around me, you are anyway specially awesome. Thanks for the advise - usually I do that but i failed (again) recently.
It's okay to be emotional, you are aware of healthy vs unhealthy emotional reactions. Also, i might add it's okay to be an emotional guy. ☺
Thanks @chelsea88 - emotional guys are everywhere, have to accept I am one of them. Have a fab Monday.
Thanks you too!