Having kids brings clarity to life, but you don't need to procreate to find the same inspiration.

The moment you hold another human you've created in your arms is the moment you realize that living an inauthentic life is no longer an option. The people around you and especially those that look up to you and who you have the fortune of stewarding thru life are mirrors of our deeper selves. They mimic what you do and how you carry yourself in a way that no other relationship will ever offer. It's a level of interdependence that cant' be recreated any other way. Notice I said interdependence and not dependence. Making that realization is key because without it you feel the burden of dependence without the countering feeling you get when you realize how much you have to gain by being a successful parent.

Getting the kind of insight into self that parenting can give you takes some people years of mindfulness practices. If you already have kids then it's just a matter of tuning into the mirror standing in front of you and asking yourself what do you see reflected back. If you don't have kids though you don't need to run out and grab the first person willing and procreate so you can get that. Here are some things that anyone can do to be better connected, more mindful and get beneficial self reflection.

1. Lead

Being a leader will help you see how you can improve yourself and fast. No team is successful without great leadership. It will test your abilities and the failures and struggles of your team will be a reflection of what you're offering as their leader. If you learn to pay attention to those things during the process then you have your answers about what you yourself might need to do some work on. If the group is low energy and grumpy, maybe you need to check your energy levels and mood. If the team is disorganized and chaotic, maybe you need to get your life in order. Remember success is not just measured by meeting goals alone, so don't count yourself as perfect if you hit the mark you were leading your team to but everyone is miserable, exhausted and burnt out.

2. Serve

If you look around and you can't find leadership opportunities around you then consider serving instead. Volunteering can give you self insight by being a reflection of your values and also reflecting back to you where you have been blessed in life. It gives you an opportunity to see your life in comparison and sometimes when that comparison are to those less fortunate then you tune into where you have taken good things for granted and maybe haven't been as grateful or humble as you should be.

3. Sensory Deprivation

Life these days is amazingly complex and fast moving. All the input we get from just going to the grocery store, from flashing street lights, to our cell phones, to people moving all around us can make your mind bounce around too much to ever really think deeply. Many places now have deprivation tanks where you can go and float, think and reflect, but even if you can't find one of those simply putting on some headphones and playing some soothing music to drown out the things that might be pulling your mind out of the zone can be helpful. Seriously tough try floating if you can.

Knowing yourself better isn't just about self improvement, it's also about understanding. That deep understanding can lead to a more productive, happy and meaningful life because it means you start living in step with your true self. It can lead to breakthroughs on problems that have plagued you or move you in directions you never thought were possible or even good. I've been lucky enough to have 5 kids so I live in a room of mirrors and I can tell you that when I learned to tune into them I saw myself move in a life direction I never imagined when I was younger. What I see is not what everyone sees because I'm uniquely me, go try some of these suggestions or open your eyes to the family around you to see what you can find out about yourself.