I Will Not Live in Vain

A forgotten promise I made to myself.

Photo by Kris Gerhard on Unsplash

it has been a struggle
looking at myself in the mirror
looking at everyone around me
knowing decades have passed
the thought of it makes me unsettled
perhaps it's just the weight of getting older

it is an existential friction
between a frail mind and an aging body
the ceaseless creases
the sprinting clock
slipping out of the hands
it feels like a loss of control

yet, there is a realization
that a version of me is waiting
on the other side of the anxiety
one who has learned the grace
of having done one's best
knowing that one will not have lived in vain

there's a warmth overcoming me
reading about that profound quiet stillness
where one finally meets oneself
a signal from a future self
who has finished reaching
someone who is finally at home

it feels like a promise of peace

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©Britt H.

Thank you for reading this.

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