Self forgiveness blog 11: Creating and living passion by investigating desire and fear of loss with writing

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to become so focused on making money, and that I’ve not accepted and allowed myself to put my process ahead of making money and put my passions and my interests ahead of making money because I am stuck in this energy of fear of loss/desire to make money

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to desire to make money and to fear losing money/fear not having enough money

I forgive myself that I’ve not accepted and allowed myself to be patient in the process of making money/having my money work for me as a point of listening to/adhering to the research I’ve done and following it in humbleness and trusting the facts

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to be and live like a dragon, as a kind of giant reptilian behemoth who does have the ability to fly but instead spends its time inside a cave protecting its pile of treasure and breathing fire at anyone who dares to enter that cave and challenge the dragon or take its treasure

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to focus on making money and the desire to make money rather than to focus on life and understanding what it means to live life effectively

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to become emotional in the desire to make money, the desire to have a home, the desire to have a car, and the desire to have everything that I want, and to think and believe that this is the answer to myself, to life, that these things will make me happy or that I will only be complete/happy when I’m able to have these things

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to want and desire to have my own business as a point to obsess over and lose myself within so that I can get lost chasing money and building my business and within this find a clever way to try and escape my process

I forgive myself tat I’ve not accepted and allowed myself to see, realize and understand that having a business and making money are only extensions of me and my process of self realization - and not the other way around

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to have the tendency to want to rush into manifestation the points that I see as points of success/things that I want and not see the gift in allowing these points to take time to come into creation as the gift of being able to prepare myself to be able to handle/be responsible with/be trusted with such points

I forgive myself that I’ve not accepted and allowed myself to see the gift of the time it takes for everything that I am building/manifesting to come into creation, as time is the gift that allows me to prepare myself effectively to be able to utilize such things in a way that is self-responsible/best for all life

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed money fears to influence me and my behaviour and the passions that I have/participate in

I forgive myself that I’ve not accepted and allowed myself to see, realize and understand that one of my passions is to live the point of passion itself, realizing: what does it mean to actually live passion practically? As I see, realize and understand that to live passion practically here in the physical world is to engage as a reader/writer, as I have always loved reading and writing when I allow myself to do it, and that to live passion practically is to utilize reading and writing as a SELF expression from which I can engage this reality and act, where I utilize reading and writing to support me in my activities, actions, passions, engagements, work, businesses, play - everything - as writing is the tool with which I can bring forth the point of passion here by looking at, questioning myself and my reality, allowing me to be in the ‘drivers seat’ and create myself/my reality through self reflection and understanding

I commit myself to walk the point of patience and ‘going with the flow’ and trusting myself and my work as a tactical point, wherein I engage in myself through tools like writing and use these tools to dig deeper and really live, living the point of self change and self expansion and practically utilizing the time I have as a point of being patient, as I see, realize and understand that being patient is not simply waiting but it is in fact utilizing the time that I am waiting in a practically effective way that assist me to grow and expand and become a better being that can be trusted with life going forward

I commit myself to engage myself and my passions with writing, as I see, realize and understand that writing is the tool with which I can self reflect and create depth/give meaning to my passions so that they are not over-simplified energetically charged pictures, but actual living expressions that I can share with others in words and self expression

I commit myself to not participate in the energy of desire as fear of loss - rather, I commit myself to investigate all of my desires in writing so that I may understand them through self reflection, keep that which is good that I may find and discard the rest - so that my participations in my journey are based in understanding, based in self, here as the physical, and not based in this energy of desire/fear of loss as I see, realize and understand that that which I desire is misunderstood and based in fear of loss, and that all desires must be investigated and understood so that they can be redefined and within that I can become a real being that lives what is best for all in practicality

I commit myself to give up the tendency/habit/pattern to want and desire to have an experience of an escape by getting lost in the energy of desire and chasing desires

I commit myself to stop the tendency to want to rush into things and get things done without questioning why it is that I am doing what I’m doing, as I see, realize and understand that when there is a rush to do anything that I am being moved by energy of fear of loss/desire

When and as I see myself having a desire/wanting something/fearing to lose something, I stop, I breathe, and I let go of this energy unconditionally, and utilize writing as a tool to investigate my desires and my fear of loss and why it is that I want what I want and why it is that I desire what I desire, so that I may understand it and redefine it/make it real and be able to live it in a way that it best for all life

I commit myself to utilize writing effectively in all that I do, participate in and want/desire to participate in, as I see, realize and understand how much I enjoy the realizations I have from the point of self reflection in writing and how much I enjoy the release of self forgiveness/self creation that I am able to create through the point of understanding that comes through writing

I commit myself to live this self realization that living real passions come through understanding and self developments that are made possible by using writing to self reflect, understand, self forgive and self create