The Grumpy Elf

The Grumpy Elf found a dildo that they would often eat. It is considered to be a strange idea, to my mum, but not to the Elf, who feels it was awe-inspring. Who would have thought, a dildo of all things.

The Grumpy Elf desperately needed a bottle of beer that they would often put up their bum. It should be a fairly weird approach to life, to me and my children, but not to the Elf, who expected that the idea was exciting. Who would have thought, a bottle of beer being the chosen item.

The Grumpy Elf searched for a spade to try to nail to the wall. It should have been a fairly funny idea, to you, but not to the Elf, who felt it was simply life. A spade is the thing to select.

The Grumpy Elf desperately craved for a can of Tango that they would rub on his belly. It would be a fairly exciting approach to life, to some, but not to the Elf, who had decided that it was in fact, wonderous. You wouldnt have thought, a can of Tango would be the item that was selected.

The Grumpy Elf wanted a crown that they would often eat. It is considered to be a surprising exercise, to you, but not to the Elf, who thought that this idea is out of this world. You wouldnt have imagined, a crown is the item to select.

The Grumpy Elf desired a custard pie that they liked to share. It is considered to be a peculiar operation, to my grandpa, but not to the Elf, who considered that it was in fact, exciting. A custard pie would be the item that was opted for.