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RE: Terminal - [Short Story - Costa Concordia Shipwreck]

in #fiction7 years ago (edited)

That was great! You've got some very nice descriptions. It sounds like you've actually been arrested by cruise-cops before. Well done.

The bit about Sarah going to school and not having much time for him was perfect in foreshadowing. It didn't trip me up with worry, so the happy story kept going forward, but it was enough to sit in the back of my mind and allow the ending to "tie things together."

BTW at 21 if I found out a girl did that to me, and then heard that her ship sunk. I'd feel the same. It may not be the most moral thing, but it's definitely believable.

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Excellent! Thanks for catching that hint about her being randomly 'unavailable'; that was indeed my intent, so that it would make sense later that he wouldn't know about her deception all along.

I agree, if I was that age of 21 (I wish I still was!) I would absolutely want to see her go down with the ship. Not nice, but probably accurate.