The Desire loop in an Hedonic treadmill

manuelhooks (72)in Hindwhale Community • yesterday

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We love wanting.

This post is completely philosophical in nature or so I think, and if you are not a fan of philosophy, then you are in the wrong hall. But I would suggest you read on, you may just discover how much you love whatever this is.

The password is contentment; it is the exact weight that balances want, have, and loss. Creating stability and peace of mind.

Have you ever noticed that we want stuff, and it could be anything? And when we want it, we want it so badly that we put much energy and pressure such that we can't rest, dreaming and envisioning the time when we will have that which we are craving for. And boom! It happens, we have got it. But now that we have what we wanted, that energy quickly changes. It is no longer in the want zone, it has moved to the have zone and its value quickly drops and we don't desire or crave it that much again because we have got it.

Call it diminishing returns if you want to, but we tend to attach less value to what we already have, compared to what we want. For this reason, we move on and start wanting something else just to enjoy the thrill that comes with wanting.
Such a shift in focus results in less attention on the things we already have, and less attention equates to neglect in most cases and that ends up in damage or loss.
Hey, that may be exactly what we unknowingly wanted all along, because once we lose what we had, its value immediately shoots up as we grieve its loss and reestablish its position again in the list of what we want, resetting the want cycle all over again.

Here is the irony, that which we once wanted, and now have and have lost interest in simply because we have it happens to be top in the list of anothers persons want, and the person is ready to go extra mile to have it. Someone else is often craving what we've grown accustomed to, as if we are hardwired to desire what's just out of reach, and value things more when they are someone else's.

_{^{Appriciate what you have}}

Now, you can substitute anything into this equation to see if it holds true under different circumstances.

Try substituting in a car, a phone, a wife or a job. It applies with equal weight in relationships.

This agrees with a local saying that says; a cow does not appreciate the value of its tail until it is cut off.

The Ibibio people call it "Asiere nket" connoting the idea that you wake up every day and you see me around and for that reason only, I lose value.

Conclusion

I think we enjoy wanting more than the things we often claim we want. The rush or high we get when we want something is what makes us feel good because we always want to want and once we have it, we want something else and will keep wanting till we learn contentment.