Establishing boundaries: Conversing with my inner self.

in Project HOPE10 months ago

Establishing boundaries: Conversing with my inner self.

One of the most difficult things I have had to do lately is undoubtedly to establish limits to my own self. That's right, telling myself when I should stop in a situation, when I should let go, when I need to understand that there is a big difference between what I want and what is really good for my life.


Source: pixabay.com

If the pandemic taught me anything, it was to value even more each day and each stage through which I go through, the years do not pass without leaving their mark and each one of them should help us to evaluate our life in terms of what we have achieved and what we still hope to achieve. There is no expiration date for goals and dreams, that is true, however, it is very important to recognize when we are no longer of age to do some things that maybe before we did.

At this point you may think that I am referring to being too old to... but, although age is more of a chronology in the organic we cannot ignore the fact that each stage of our bodily development has unique characteristics that allow us to do things that as the years go by, although not impossible, will be a little more complex. Setting limits for ourselves is one of the most noble commitments and tasks we have with our lives, because many of the unpleasant situations that have happened or may happen to us depend on whether we allow them to happen or not.


Source: pixabay.com

Setting limits for ourselves is about not pleasing other people, not using labels and establishing comparisons with others that have nothing to do with who we are, how we feel and think. Setting limits is not allowing them to abuse our trust and our good will, it is taking away from others the possibility of hurting us, of interfering in our lives. When we set boundaries with ourselves we must center our self in the here and now of our well-being, it is about accepting what is good for me and letting go of everything that could affect me.

To set limits for ourselves we must:

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1.- Think about the unique, wonderful and diverse beings we are.
2.- Connect with our wellbeing in a holistic way, that is, establish a balance between my thoughts, emotions, reactions and actions.
3.- To understand that I cannot be everything to everyone and nothing to myself.
4.- To seek first my well-being and balance.
5.- To think about the consequences of my decisions when I place myself in the background.
6.- To understand that economic power can never be above health.
7.- To recognize in me the healthy habits of life to enhance them and unhealthy habits to eliminate them.


Source: pixabay.com

8.- To stop blaming myself for everything. This implies assuming that there are situations that are not part of what I can control.
9.- Not to break myself into pieces so that others can be complete. How many of us have not let ourselves be trapped in situations where we demand more from ourselves, where we demand more of ourselves so that others can be happy and calm while we lose our own life.
10.-To always get the best out of every situation and understand that everything is temporary. Not to cling and to experience each moment with the intensity and value it deserves.
11.- To learn to say no, when we simply do not want to or when what is being asked of us exceeds our own capabilities.
12.- Never allow anyone to waste our time.

These aspects, points, contributions or however you wish to see it are perhaps expressions of what we all already know but do not put into practice for fear of being rejected, because we believe that the more we please others the more acceptance we will have and I will tell you something one thing has nothing to do with the other, pleasing others is a selfish act with my own life, being accepted does not depend on how much you give, but how much you allow others to be and live, how human you are and how much self-love you may have.

References

Images for free use at pixabay.com
Image 1. Lavnatalia
Image 2. Renan_Brun
Image 3. JenDigitalArt

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Hello dear @emimoron, I really liked your article, we certainly can't sacrifice our things to make others happy, there are many things you mentioned that are true and we must put into practice even if sometimes our neighbor generates.

See you later, have a great week.

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