The Art of Saying "NO!"

in #life5 years ago

👉 Hey you! 👋
It's OK to let your feet hang, it's OK to sit on the side lines, it's OK to say "no thanks, I'd rather sit this one out" if that's...(drum roll 🥁🥁🥁)

WHAT YOU REALLY WANT! 💪✨

Please hear me when I REMIND YOU to GIVE PERMISSION TO YOURSELF!

That's right, you're not giving anyone else control or power but YOU to speak up and say what would make YOU happy!

Sometimes that means skipping a birthday dinner, a game/sports event, a meet up, a date, a class... Whatever you organize yourself into...(that usually means having previously made plans/commitment to another person or organization.)

There is responsibility (that is, your ability to respond) to what you have signed up for -- maybe that's work, maybe that's a fitness class, maybe that's being a role model for youth...

And then there's something else and that's PERCEIVED SOCIAL OBLIGATION--

The idea/judgement that you HAVE to do something to belong/fit in... So that people will like you, so that you'll be a part of the group, so that you're not alone.

This ignited the psychological desire within us, driven from a survival instinct to band together since we have a higher chance of surviving by grouping up.

I'm going to be the one to tell you this secret: PEOPLE WILL LIKE YOU A LOT MORE WHEN YOU ARE DOING WHAT YOU WANT/LIKE!

So, next time someone wants you to do something that you really don't want to do and you feel the pressure burst up your spine as you go back and forth in your mind...

Remember... You can let your feet hang if that's what you'd prefer. You don't have to always say "yes!" You can do what's best for you sometimes too and that's OK!

People love a reason! (It's even better if it's the truth!)

You'd be surprised how freeing speaking your truth can be! Give it a try!

Is there a time you can think of that you did something you really didn't want to because you were nervous to say "no"?

💜 Tell me about it in the comments!

Love,
Cece 😘

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I love this! It took me a while to figure it but I finally did. Now I’ve finally learned to say no to myself as well ...sometimes you really want to go or you really want to stay but your body or your heart are telling you not to. When you are too sick to go meet your friends for example, or too tired to stay out even when you are having fun, that was the hardest for me

That's great @whatamidoing! I don't think that our culture really promotes "no" so it can be hard and take a long time to get used to it. Dealing with the disappointment and set backs from friends can also be challenging but I am happy to hear that you're taking this control in your own life, I am positive it leads to a much happier and healthy existence here =D

Hi, noticed this was your first post on NaturalMedicine.io.

Even though you’ve been blogging on Steem for a while, I’d like to congratulate you for choosing to add your content into our Tribe’s platform.

Your work is super-ace!!

This resonated so well with me when I read it, it seems I often just cannot day “no” even when I want to. I need to get to the utmost extreme of things before I can do that.

Weird, huh?!?

Hey @ravenlotus!
I joined Steem a long time ago and actually was gone for a while unfortunately so I am still catching up to all that's new here! First of all, I have to say that I love the idea of the Natural Medicine fork, I still need to learn more about it and how to best interact with it but that is exactly my kind of tribe so I am super happy to have found you all and would love to continue being part of it!

It's definitely not weird in my opinion-- in fact, it's much more common than you would think! I have struggled with getting the "no" unblocked from my throat for YEARS and still sometimes I find myself in situations where I wish I had said "no" earlier (then have to find a way out then...) It just takes practice and communication techniques to feel comfortable saying what you need. You'll get it and I plan to post a lot more about this as it was truly challenging for me for most of my life!
Sending you a virtual hug, thank you for the warm invite!

That water looks beautiful - good enough to jump in!

It took me some time to learn to say no. i still struggle with it.

It was some of the most beautiful water I have ever seen and to be fair, I did jump in but not from as high as I was sitting in the picture even though my friends wanted me to ;) That was a big "no" for me haha.

It can be very hard sometimes and sometimes, it's helpful to push through the fear but it all depends at the end of the day, what you want and if you're being true and honoring that in my opinion. :)