I am sorry for your down. I hope my response is not offensive but you have to keep hope. Being homeless is not your only option. Your only skill set is not bartending. Move some place with community. In Alaska I can offer you your own warm cabin, home cooked meals, help getting medical coverage, and most important a community. I am sure there are closer places but for real Alaska is an option.
Man, i wish I this was taking place in Alaska... :))
NYC is not very big on the community thing, as far as I know -- it's a shame, but I haven't come across anything like that, here... Thanks so much for the very kind and generous comment @lanadancer!