Religion is Hurting My Relationships
Religion has played a role in my life since I was about 12 years old. At that time, my family decided it would be a good idea to attend church. After that first Sunday, we were regular church members. I participated in Sunday School and continued to do so until I graduated High School.
I enjoyed it for the most part, but I felt like something was "off". This really bugged me since I thought I was fully commited and I was even baptized. Around my sophomore year of high school, I started really listening to a popular podcast called The Joe Rogan Experience. Joe Rogan was the host of Fear Factor, and up until recently was a regular commentator for the UFC. He considers himself an agnostic, and he often shows that in his opinions and discussions that he has with his guests.
As I started to listen, I felt as if I was "home". What I mean is that I finally found a group of people who thought like I did. Joe didn't claim to know everything, and he thinks it is okay not to know everything (including Gods existense).
This new lease on life really made me push away from religion, and I started to go just to make everyone around me happy. Im currently in my Junior year of college, and I am dating a girl I met 2 years ago. She is a Christian and her father is a minister. She is okay with me not being a believer, but I can tell it bothers her at least a little.
My family does not know I feel this way, and I know it would hurt them deeply and there level of disappointment would tear me up inside. I hate that it has to be this way. I'm from the South, and it is so hard to be who I am without feeling so judged.
Religious beliefs should not be the test as to whether a person is good or not. Unfortunately, that is the reality I live in. I dont know if I will be able to come out as an agnostic one day, but I still hope that day will come.
Have any of you had similar experiences?
Cheers guys
Thanks for all of the comments guys, I like talking on this subject and it is encouraging to see people who can disagree but can be nice and civil.
Cheers
I'm a Christian just FYI...
I think it's very reasonable to question the nature of EVERYTHING. However, most things we believe, ultimately, cannot be proved and therefore we all need to act upon the limited evidence we've been given. I think if God gives you no sign of his existence, then it's not fair for you to be condemned for not following him...However, I believe it's our duty as humans to examine our lives and live virtuously and defining that is hard without seeking out truth wherever it may be found. (Which in my experience leads back to God)
I wish you luck on your journey...if you're still conflicted at all or want to hear more logical defenses of Christianity, I'd recommend reading "Mere Christianity" and "The Great Divorce" by C.S. Lewis.
This. ^
The way you feel is normal. Every Christian has periods of doubt and times when they don't feel close to God. I think organized religion is the problem. It fails us as humans. It sets a lot of rules and ideals for you to follow and there's the whole building full of people watching to see if you do or not.
When I was a little older than you (almost 20 years ago), I went through a period when I questioned everything I'd been taught. I had to find a way to reconcile what was happening in my life with my faith. There was a time when I'd almost completely turned my back on God and He reached out to me.
Needless to say, the doubts have been gone since, but I don't attend church anymore. In the process, I lost pretty much my entire friend base. Think it through. Process your thoughts fully. Prepare for a disconnect, but know that you can recover. I wish you the best on your journey.
Its a tough situation to be in. Especially since agnostic is just part of the atheists spectrum haha. I agree with your ideas though, you will feel better when you come out and be honest, but change happens over time, take it all one day at a time and when it feels right you will express how you feel. all the best
I disagree that agnostics are part of the atheist spectrum.
Like religions people, atheists believe in something via an act of faith.
Agnostics dont. They are in the exact middle of the wheel of all beliefs (religions and atheists) saying... 'I don't know.'
To be an Atheist, requires faith and commitment of belief to something that can never be proven. Sure, its a belief that 'no, there are no gods'. But belief nonetheless. After all, you cannot prove there is no god, when a god could simply have forgotten earth exists, and never notices.
Thus, atheism has more in common with religion than it does agnosticism.
Yeah I agree 100 percent. I considered myself atheist for a while. But i realized I was having faith that what I couldn't prove was the right way of thinking. Agnostic is the most reasonabke in my opinion.
Thanks for writing a well thought out reply and not trolling me lol. The only worthy conversation is debate, so I am here to debate a few parts of your argument, or at least lay out my disagreement.
I disagree that atheists believe in a lack of gods the same as a religious man believes there are gods. I think arriving at the atheist perspective is a path full of evidence that points clearly to there being no gods. Being agnostic is the stance that since you can't ever know, then why bother pondering it in the first place. Sort like saying that the topic isn't even worth debating. But there is loads of scientific and mathematical evidence pointing to the lack of gods. Read anything by Richard Dawkins and this becomes quite, well... evident haha. Or since reading is a relic now, watch PBS Space Time on YouTube, and view evidence yourself from experts in the field.
An atheist is a person who just has a lower threshold of being convinced by the evidence than an agnostic. While the evidence makes is very very very unlikely any gods exist, an agnostic withholds his final decision because you can't KNOW (like 100%). But since you can't truly know anything, you turn to evidence and likelihoods.
Atheism should not be considered equal but opposite to any belief or faith for those reasons
Cheers
PS- I suppose some might say that there is evidence of gods existing, so this evidence must be weighed against evidence of lack of gods. I argue that there is no scientific evidence for gods to be. This is because evidence of a god existing is non-falsifiable, and therefore not scientific at all.
I pray to the great spaghetti monster! Best of luck in figuring things out worh others though. Do you! 😊🙏