Age is not just a Number for Women

in #relationships7 years ago

I have heard in the past that one of the best ways of checking the level of a person’s honesty is by asking for his or (especially) her age. Using an armchair method of research, six out of ten people are likely to give you a wrong age, two out of the other four who would tell you their real age, would only do so after some form of hesitation or mumbling. The other two who would be completely open and honest, would either be kids who do not understand the need to cover up their age, or people who are above the age of 40 and must have celebrated their 40th birthday publicly! There is always a huge fuss surrounding this age matter that one begins to wonder why so much emphasis is placed on it. From politics, to sports (especially football), to even relationships, age is regarded as much more than just a number.


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The norm around the world is for an older guy to date, have a relationship or marry a lady younger than he is. It is even an issue sometimes if the lady is seen to be a lot younger than the guy. Not everyone accepts the union between say a 46 year old guy and a 21 year old girl. The guy will most likely have to explain what he would be doing with a small girl. He would either be looked at as somewhat irresponsible for loving someone who was born when he was already an adult, or probably seen to have had a history of child abuse, without people considering the fact that “love knows no age”! But it is even tougher when it is the opposite (i.e. an older woman and a younger man).


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I once had a brief relationship with a lady who was about 3 years older than me. Things looked to be going on smoothly until few weeks down the line when she remembered to ask me the question; how old are you? After I answered with evidence of an identity card, she replied saying that she was not sure we could continue seeing each other anymore since we really had no future together. Not putting on a sad face, I knew from the start that the relationship might not survive for long due to the age gap. Although, she claimed not to mind having the relationship but unfortunately the society will mind and our families would mind even more. Regardless of the fact that we might have started falling in love, we called things off and became just friends.

There are examples of relationships that worked despite the huge age difference either from the man or the woman. We have seen cases in Hollywood, where these relationships have worked. The late musician Aaliyah (then 16 years old), dated a much older R. Kelly. There was so much talk then about how wrong it was. But Aaliyah simply replied all the critics with a hit single aptly titled “Age Ain’t Nothing but a Number”.
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Demi Moore divorced her long standing husband Bruce Willis, only to end up with a much younger man. She was also with Ashton Kutcher for a couple of years even though there was almost a 20 year age gap between them. Similarly, the current French President got married to his teacher. In Nigeria, Richard Mofe Damijo, was very happily married and in love with the media heavyweight, May Ellen-Eziekel, who was older than he was. They were together until she died tragically, showing that only death could do them part and not age. All these show that relationships can work as long as you can put love first before age.

Is age just a number to you too? I mean can you marry someone ten to fifteen years older than you? Don’t ask me because I am taken.

@henryndunka

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Society has put some much emphasize on the age thing. I personally don't think it is an issue except it is far too extreme.

I have met a lady that was doubting the future of our relationship then because I am just a year older than her...I didn't see any fuss about that one but society has embedded a kind of 'your man must be considerably older than you' in her mentality. Age is one thing, maturity/understanding/endurance is another. To some, like me, age is a number, it a depends on the maturity/experience/understanding of whoever I am dealing. But to some the age difference must be 'society approved' or give them the illusion of maturity.

Too much importance has been giving to the age thing even in other spheres of our lives, which is why people choose to have an official age (or football age as we like to call it here) which is quite different from their real age.

So sorry about the girl that left because you are just a year older than her. Maybe she was looking for a husband she can be calling "Daddy wa" (Yoruba word for 'our daddy') in the nearest future. Instead or sweet names, due to the wide age gap, you will become the (New Daddy). Let me ask, if age is just a number to you can you date a girl older than you? Thanks for stopping bye

Such is life. I left because she's years past me and she left because you are a year ahead of her. Hmm..
Here's a toast to love found in Steen blockchain. 🍻

Wow... First I'd like to sing this song, if you ask me... An who I go ask? Well I would not lie to you ooo, the age thing is serious issue. The thing is most women believe older men would give them the kind of understanding they need and the wisdom as well.

There is nothing terrible in a relationship as dating or married to someone who is lesser than you as a woman, first at some point he will begin to feel threatened which is a natural phenomenon. Trust me when he starts to feel that way he become insecure and from insecurity comes all sort of mishandling which might end up breaking them eventually.

Well I agree not all younger men are immature but 82% of them are. Although most people want to grow together and all of that but trust me women feel they deserve love from an older partner because with them they feel more secure and protected.

I love this topic dear.

82% line is an arm chair research. A lady wants to feel more secured and protected. Hmmmm . . . just like how Baba Buhari dey secure and protect Aisha in 'da oza room'. Age na big and serious business especially for women.

There is nothing terrible in a relationship as dating or married to someone who is lesser than you as a woman, first at some point he will begin to feel threatened which is a natural phenomenon.

Been here, done that. She's 4 years older than I am, but she doesn't look it. And I looked older than my age(at least before I stopped the rapid growth). I was so cool with her and she's homely either; a perfect gift to mama. But the natural phenomenon rear its ugly head in my spirit and I started seeing the age and not the love as a big "ish". Trust me, what you said is aptly right. It's so instinctual for men.