Can Love Survive 18 Years in Marriage? — Interviewed two Steemians on their 18th Anniversary

in Steem Cameroon • last month (edited)

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Can love really survive for years in this wicked world where we hear of broken homes, separation, divorce and cheating almost on a daily basis? Is the fault from a man or from a woman or their inability to love? Could pressure to marry from family members have a hand in these messes we see today?

.So I decided to interview two Steemians who have been married for 18 good years, and they happened to celebrate their anniversary the day I interviewed them. This was on the 8th of December, 2025. These Steemians are

@benton3@ngoenyi

Both of them have been married for years with kids without having problems that would lead to separation and divorce. Marriage is bound to face difficulties, problems and challenges, but when couples remember their marriage vows, they find it difficult to go astray. For better or worse, they'll always love each other – that's what keeps most marriages today.

To keep this interview brief, I decided to record only that of @benton3, This is part 1 of the interview phase, as I'll feature the wife in part 2.

Before the Interview

Before the interview, I asked my audience two daunting questions that needed answers. Most of them expressed their answers in voice notes. I'll give out their answers in part 2. Let the questions whet your appetite.

Question 1
If you're in love with someone and you plan on marrying that person, but your parents don't agree to such a marriage, what would you do? Note: You love this person, and the person loves you, but your parents strongly disagree that both of you will marry, even with all your convictions. What would you do?

Question 2
If you're married with kids and you have a job outside this country, will you leave your family and attend to that job? Note: Your kids aren't teenagers. Your pay is $200 weekly. The only time you have a break is during festive periods. Will you accept the job offer, or will love make you reject it and stay with your family?

Placing @benton3 on Hot Seat

@bossj23: Welcome to this hot seat, Sir. Once again, happy anniversary to you

@benton3: Thank you.

@bossj23: Ohkay Sir benton. Can you describe your wife to us in one sentence?

@benton3: She is a god-fearing, lovely, charming young woman.

@bossj23: That's cool to hear. Next question. Question 2 When you were single, did you admire other women before her, or was she the first person you saw and said.... Achalugo, it is you I want to Marry?

@benton3: Concerning the question, I'm not the type that moves around in group formation. I'm always careful with women, most especially young women. Right from when I was a young man, I always avoided anything that would make it seem like I was taking advantage of them. So I never went too close. I also had a friend who's a lady. We were very close, but not on marital levels. We grew up together, and the friendship is still maintained even after she got married, and we all got married and had children. Even till now, we talk. She knows my wife, and I know the husband. We relate very well, but my wife was the first and only person I approached for marriage because I really took time to understand that that was what I wanted, and I wanted a situation whereby any lady I proposed to, we would be able to date and marry under one year. So she was the first and the last person I met and proposed to marry
.

@bossj23: Wow. That's interesting to know. Next question. Question 3 Were you pressured or forced into marriage? Probably from family, friends, etc.... Do you think there are consequences for being pressured into marriage? For example: you're the first son. Why are you still single? Your mates are married. You should marry and give me grandchildren. Some may say I'll support the marriage. Just find a woman. Something like this...

@benton3: For the first question, I wasn't forced or pressured into marriage. We don't have that in our family. You marry when you know you're ready to do so. It's in our bloodline anyway. My uncles got married when they felt they were ready. For the second question, there are always consequences for being pressured into marriage. One such is that you'll not have peace of mind because you don't really love the person, and because you don't love the person, you find it difficult to tolerate the person's imperfections and all those things that come from the fact that we're not perfect beings. Once you're pressured into a marriage and perhaps you have a little burnout, you'll transfer the aggression to your mate, and eventually, that marriage will start falling apart as the use of words will be paramount till it tears and leaves you guys in a separated state. For the third one, I'm the first son, and I had friends that were quite older than me. And I remember one of my lawyer friends back then who called me to his chambers and sat me down. He told me that if he were to turn back the hands of the clock, that once he's 25, he would marry and that family problems and responsibilities can never finish. So you marry and carry everybody along, including extended and immediate family. Personally, I accepted that advice and gave myself a time limit on when I wanted to marry, and when the time came, I told my dad that this was what I wanted. He never objected, but he specifically told me that he hoped it wouldn't stop me from carrying out my responsibilities. I told him no and that I would try my best. With his blessing, as he already knew my wife, I had a head go. So the answer is, I wasn't pressured; nobody forced me. I made the decision at an early age.

@bossj23: I'm touched by your answers. To all the singles ones that are yet to marry or are venturing into marriage, marriage isn't a bed of roses. Don't allow anyone pressure you into marriage as you're the only one to face the consequences when a turn strikes

@bossj23: Thanks for being on this show.

This interview is mostly for men who are contemplating marriage or for those who are already in their marital home. Part 2 would be exclusively for ladies.

Interview Video

IPFS Video

Posted with Speem

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     last month 
    Thank you for your valuable efforts! Keep posting high-quality content for a chance to receive more support from our curation team
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       last month 

      Happy blessed new year @bossj23 and a happy sustained 18th marriage anniversary to Mr. @bentons and Mrs. @ngoenyi, i pray God to continue and strengthen this eternal union of love as your children will continue to replicate your morals within and outside your home in Jesus's name, Amen21x.

      @bossj23, once again you have shown your class in this community, your creativity and impacts on different aspects grow everyday.

      The interview is able to the couples to reflect their love live and refresh their good times together for long 18th anniversary without breaking apart.

      You the interviewer find the best wife as @ngoenyi is decribed by her husband.

      Congratulations and cheers to the beautiful years of your marriage. God bless you and your children.

      FreshGrace

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         last month 

        Thank you so much

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           last month 

          Thanks for this my Boss. I really appreciate. I'll definitely find a wife that would be more than a capable wife. I see what you do in your diary games. Little wonder your wife loves you more.

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             last month 

            Amen21x o

            Take your time and pray for a good wife while you prepare yourself to remain a good man.

            Marriage is Marriage...and very sweet.

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               last month 

              Thank you for the interview. In deed, love can survive. Every marriage is bound to have problems but learning to forgive and put up with each other is the only way to survive. Above all, allowing the originator of marriage to be the third person in the marriage will always make a difference. Cheers to our 18th wedding anniversary!

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                 last month 

                It was a privilege learning from the words of your lips. I'm arranging a video of your own interview this week. And please ma..... Can you assist with this question? I asked group members when you weren't online.

                If you're married with kids and you have a job outside this country, will you leave your family and attend to that job? Note: Your kids aren't teenagers. Your pay is $200 weekly. The only time you have a break is during festive periods. Will you accept the job offer, or will love make you reject it and stay with your family?

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                   29 days ago 

                  Hello @bossj23, it was interesting reading through this article, hearing myself speak. I am privileged to be given such an opportunity. All thanks to you.

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