SAC-Wk122 — Is Cohabiting called Marriage?
Welcome to my blog. It’s another beautiful time to explore a very delicate matter. The subject of cohabiting and marriage.
If someone lives with a woman and bears children without paying her bride price, do we say they are couples or married?
There is a saying that whatever is what doing is worth doing well and that also involves the subject of marriage and procreation. We have seen a lot of moral decadence, decrement and degradation on the subject of marriage and procreation. In the beginning it was not so.
Marriage was ordained by God from the Biblical standpoint and one of its reasons was for procreation. But nowadays we see a lot of people who live together (cohabit) with each other and give birth to children without being married.
No matter how long these relationships have lasted, we cannot say that these people are married. They are simply two people living together. Who had sex with one another and gave birth to children. Before two people can be called married, there is a legal process they have to follow. Until these procedures are followed, they cannot be called married.
A lot of people boycott these marriage process because of a lot of reasons. Some basically because of financial reasons, others say they need to taste their partners as if they are a produce in the market and before you know it, they start living together and then the man is no longer willing to go through the process and etc.
What's your view on cohabiting? Is it a short cut to getting married?
A lot of people cohabit thinking it’s a short cut to getting married but like I said. I don’t think so. When two people starts living together and enjoying all the benefits of being married without actually passing through the process, it’s actually turns out to hurt them especially the woman.
When two persons are married, they are in a sacred covenant and this covenant is not without its challenges because no marriage is perfect. But they have an underneath resolve to make their marriage work as against when they are just cohabiting.
There’s no commitment to a lasting relationship and one of the parties may seek an easy way out as against resolving their issues and this can become chaotic when children are involved. I think it more or less cuts relationships short than being a short cut. Marriage has no short cut. For any person to be called married, there must be due procedures followed and when people boycott that procedure, they are just cohabitating and can never be said to be married.
Are there advantages or disadvantages of cohabiting?
Cohabiting may have seemingly advantages like helping two people share bills for example, instead of the man and the woman to live in separate houses and paying different bills, they may come together under the same roof and then save some money but I am still not in support of this especially for the woman. Don’t live with a man who has not married you. The regrets are far more than the benefits if there’s any.
The couple may get to know each other more when they cohabit.
Disadvantage
Disadvantage is that they may end up never getting married because why would a man want to go through the process of marrying you when he’s getting everything already for free. Why pay for the cow when you can get the milk for free they say. So you see, the woman ends up loosing.
People do not regard women who are not legally married with respect. They simply see you as a cheap entity who threw herself to a man and gave birth for him. I have seen scenarios where this caused serious issues especially after the woman’s death. Her people will insist that she must be married even at death. So the husband is forced to pay the bride price of a corpse with other punishments for not doing the right thing.
There is no binding commitment on the parties and they seek cheap exit at any slightest challenge leading to heart breaks and it’s even worse when there are children already existing from such cohabitation. The woman keeps hoping that one day the man while arise and marry her rightly but it never happens.
Is it good to sexually test the person you want to marry before considering to marry them? What's your viewpoint?
No, no, no. Speaking from a Biblical standpoint. Sex outside of marriage is Fornication. God instituted marriage and it should be done the right way. No body is a cheap commodity in the market that has to be tested before being bought.
Sex is sacred and should be treated as such. No testing. Our marriage beds should be kept undefiled. If we follow God’s standards when it comes to marriage, we will definitely get it right. As a Christian and from Christian standpoint, the Bible is very clear in this subject and I choose to stand with God unapologetically. Thank you.
Thank you @ruthjoe for the support.