It is real and the sooner we realize that, the better. I get episodes of self hate, dissentment and feeling defeated and a failure. During those times , my bed seems to have a magnet attached to my body. Thoughts of suicide are always welcoming and seem a quick way out as solution to a problem. I figjt my self, bite my nails, starve my self and cry my eyes out. Shut my self in my room for couple days, sometimes a whole week without stepping out or seeing the light of day. Simple things like shower or personal hygiene become a burden. . And when the whole episode is gone, i would gather my self up, put on a smile and be picture perfect. But only i know am dying inside.

Most people dont take this as a serious disorder, but the sooner the better. we should stop putting off our friends, loved ones, partners when they need a shoukder to lean on, because you dont know if u are saving thst person from suicide.

Thats why for me, no matter how bad a friendship or relationship ends, if that person calls me years later and tells me I NEED YOU, il always be there. Becaude i know what and how it feels like.