Well, this can be tricky, can't it? When I run into someone who is pumping out negativity like an open fire hydrant, my first thought is this: "What has happened to this person that has put them into this state?"

It's the old "Walk a mile in their moccasins" concept. I have found that if I focus more on learning why someone is in this state, instead of focusing on the state itself, it allows me to accomplish two very important things.

1. Understanding is power. If I can find a way to determine the why, it places me in a position to potentially help, perhaps in only a small way, this person who is obviously hurting. Not always.

2. By understanding the why, it offers both insulation against that negativity and an opportunity to appreciate all of the good things in my own life, including this potential opportunity to help someone else who is struggling.

Projecting back to the person is a powerful tool. "I can feel how distressed you are in this moment." Or perhaps, "Man, I can feel how unhappy you are right now. What are you going to do?"

Turn their negativity into an opportunity to find a solution for themselves.
And sometimes, they haven't even realized that they were being so ragged. This statement comes across as cold water to their self-awareness, and can jumpstart a change in their state.

For those who seem perpetually negative, or worse - destructive - I will eventually separate myself from them physically and emotionally. While we can influence others, we cannot fix others. Knowing just how much influence we have, how to plant the seeds of self-awareness and hope, and then when it's time to break away, is an art learned over time and through experience...