Grief, Death of a Pet, and @mariannewest's Boya
@mariannewest's post, Grief, came to mind when I ran across an old post of mine on Facebook:
@mariannewest wrote:
I haven't stopped crying since it happened and I am surprised at myself. After all, she is - was - a dog. Not a human.
If people have souls, so do our beloved animal friends.
Even if it's only The Velveteen Rabbit principle: toys who are loved enough become "real," and animals who are so loved have a place in heaven or whatever hereafter may await us.
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NDE, Near-Death Experience, has not been scientifically refuted.
People who almost died but came back often report having seen a loved one welcoming them on the other side. One child described a woman who could only be the aunt he never met. I'm ever a skeptic but a wannabeliever, i.e., I wanna believe, I want this warm, welcoming afterlife to be real. If it is, our beloved pets will be there to greet us, tails wagging.
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The woman who write Dear Abby needs to move beyond
her bitterness at the lack of sympathy she got, but I totally know the feeling, the loss of a loved one being a 'mere animal,' therefore excessive grieving is somehow unwarranted.... right.
Sorry for not seeing this post earlier, but I totally feel your pain, and am so sorry for your loss.
And yes, it hurts to be marginalized by those who don't get it, or like @enginewitty, who get it too well, and can't think of what to say, and/or can't bring themselves to comment. I've been there myself in the past.
Animals absolutely have souls, and I've yet to look deeply into the eyes of any dog, cat, whale or many other species, and not felt another soul looking back into mine. They are our greatest champions, and if we do it right, we are theirs.
I've posted before about the losses of my Newfoundlands, Ebony and Sprinkles, and both were defining moments in my life, that changed me and, ultimately, moved me forward on my spiritual path.
Animals are a gift of love, insight and humor, and I treasure them all, even those I never meet. Wishing you and yours healing and good memories abounding.
I did see that post, I honestly had no words for @mariannewest. Everything that came to mind, if I'd of heard it, would have made me feel worse or cry. 😶
Good point you make, @enginewitty - it's instinctive for people to want to offer words of comfort to others who are grieving for a lost loved one - yet words backfire, and fail, or at best fall short. When my sister was killed, not one word of "consolation" ever consoled. And yet, knowing the futility of words, I continue to offer words myself - as if I didn't know better. Thanks for the reminder.
Oh no!
I DID NOT WRITE THAT LETTER to Dear Abby. Oh man. Oh no. That was not me. I hope I made that clear...
ok, if one reads the whole post, one should grasp that it wasn't me:
