My Life in a Van - Florida - Meet Professor Jelly, Our Pet Snail (R.I.P)

Meeting Professor Jelly

Last year in Sarasota @Dashie and I were taking a leisurely night-stroll around a nice neighborhood where we were somewhat stealthily parking, and something magical happened. We stumbled upon a snail, slowly moving across the street, taking in the night air.

This was a particularly magical event because Dashie had just been talking about wanting a pet snail. She wasn't necessarily interested in the wonderful companionship, though she would come to cherish their interactions. Instead, she was in it for the sweet nectar known as hyaluronic acid.

So we scooped Professor Jelly up, gave him his credentials, and made a little home for him out of a plastic container that used to hold chocolates.

Snail Nectar

Hyaluronic acid is somewhat of a trendy additive to skin creams, particularly for your face. I know it has some action on free-radicals, but I'm not exactly sure of why the French put it in their expensive skin creams.

If you want more info on the properties of HA, here is the wiki link: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hyaluronic_acid#Skin_healing

Snail Oil Salesmen?

While we weren't certain of how to extract the HA, our minds ran wild with fantasies of a snail based venture, in which we provided wild-caught snails to customers world-wide, with Professor Jelly as the face of the business. Perhaps we could order large amounts of snails from China on the cheap?

Alas, these fantasies never materialized into a solid business proposal, and so Dashie & I decided just to keep PJ as a pet and travel companion.

The brief Life of Professor Jelly

All tucked away in his/her (PJ was a hermaphrodite) plastic container, PJ, Dash, and I were ready to leave Florida. PJ's new home wasn't the Ritz, but he seemed happy with his dirt, some leaves, and some carrots. Interesting note, snail poo comes out in the color of whatever they ate, so orange poo was a regular sight in his container.

Our new travel companion made it over 2000 miles with us, all the way to Phoenix, AZ, but we noticed he seemed to be behaving differently in the weeks leading up to our arrival into PHX. He was creating some sort of chrysalis around himself, and we often not sure if he was alive or dead, then we'd see him again.

We had to stop in Phoenix to see what would be our 7th mechanic in something like 4 months, and unfortunately, it was already June and hot as Satan's dick pics. One day, we left our Rialta with the mechanic and went off to do some work, and made the grave mistake that cost PJ his life.

We left him in the Rialta. When we came back everything in the vehicle was hot to the touch, having absorbed the 106 F temps all day. That must have been the last day Professor Jelly had on this Earth. Dashie was sad, but don't you fret. Professor Jelly got to travel multiple states, which I am certain is a rarity for snails with his economic background.

It was a good experience for us too, as it made clear the reality that we could not have any kind of pet travel with us, as we could not even keep a snail alive for more than a month.

Dashie has a great time-lapse video of one of our first nights as PJ's adopted parents, in which PJ slithers and slimes his special snail juices all over her face. How do you think Dashies skin looks so good! It's great, I'll make sure she posts it soon.

I'll leave you with this great video of Dashie kissing a random bird that was hitting on her, in Siesta Key, Sarasota.

Onward Indian.
Love,
Glowmo