Ulog: Life Can Turn Love Into Mere Feelings And Mere Feelings In Nothingness. We Love Still. (unedited)
Things are tough. From yesterday to today was hospital and me doing episodes of things, that I did with my mum for 16 days before she passed but this time with my dad.
Words are pretty weak; thoughts can be too; reality is something else.
My dad is calmer now and in the hospital but we will gradually go home on this one. It is tough.
I dislike tests and all. I won't do them for myself. My dad has to and I wait. We wait. Some results came and we will do some more.
He is a sweet man; I love him but this very love-breed is very complicated. Yes love aint feelings; it is dead stronger, for feelings can be weak too and short of love (in its weightiness).
Yes, you can love even where feelings die because you have become about loving, feelings or no feelings.
I love him. I feel everything for him about him; I miss him but I am still not able to love him well/right or is there a right or wrong way to love, if it is love still?
So yes love is beyond feelings because feelings are weak in comparison but when it reall boils down to it, love can fall weak to because life in this system of things is something else.
It is not Mathematics but its all complicated and yes, geeks can solved this because it is not Mathematics and yes, their complicated stuff without solutions in the books.
It is all complicated, till Paradise comes and answers it all.
I wish my dad knew me. I wish he can come to know me, the beautiful son he created. My entire tired being feels this beauty and it is beautiful. I miss him alot. I do want to talk to him andI tell him of the beauty his was core in. He can't see but he has abilities, for just if he hears it, his cute large ears will process it and in his mind's eyes, he will see it.
He wants Phd for me, till date. Even in his world, he calls himself the "prayer warrior for the entire world". We share a dream but in different era(s).
I so love him because every time is see him, I see him but is my love strong enough? "It used to be so powerful" but life takes alot of its toll and suddenly, my love that I feel will move mountains, isn't even moving. Like half human I start to watch as they pumped on her frail frame till she was gone for real and now, I am watching all over again?
No to this one!
No to this one!
This particular man will be back home, his mind back in the right place and I will speak to the man that bore like a son and we will see where we are at and we will share large smiles.
I will tell him of the teardrops SMT, the ever-ongoing bus-stop where will reward every tear.
I will tell of https://ulogs.org and about true celebrity-hood for everyone, once and for all.
I will tell him https://steemgigs.org that will build every noble dream.
Then ofcourse, I will tell him of Surpassing Google, his boy Terry.
Your boy Terry
You can inspire me too by supporting my witness, it is called:
"steemgigs"
to rep everyone.
unedited!!!
It brings tears in my eyes :( Every line you wrote is from your heart and i can feel it, I never Ever read something with this much intention.
I totally agree with you, how much it hurts when you are in the hospital and your father is admitted in the hospital and Nurse cam and she needs blood for tests, it hurts when they dip the needle in the hands or in vain to take our blood :( it hurts it hurts :(
Yes you are our boy terry and our support is with you and your initiative of #ulog and #steemgig.
God bless you, Terry, @surpassinggoogle <3
Nothing is impossible for God to do. All you need do is believe Sir Terry. God will take the pain from off your father.
I pray that the healing hand of God locate him right where he is in Jesus Name. Amen.
I stand with you and say:
You're not frail Terry, whenever it gets bad I try to think of how frail you might be and how hard it is for that feeble you to take in all these, but it always comes back a solid, you're not frail. You're the strongest strength in your weakness. Your tears are now more meaningful than ever, whether of joy or pain, because in its every atom are different significant breeds of hope, faith and believe for the world, I say this because when I feel my strength is failing, I try your words once more, I imagine you in your entirety, and it always brings me home.
Papa will return home with you sound. He will see you like he never has, and you will have that conversation. You will share that smile. And don't worry much, you love him sufficiently, sorry, that's the only way I could measure it.
I love this one Terry, it's more original than the other originals to me. It's Unedited!
Hopefully, he gets back to normal and your wishes come true.
Be strong Terry!
I'd like to share this with you, from Isaiah 41:10:
Hey Terry, listen to Jehovah talk to you in the above expressions.
Terry we love you!
Amen Big Bro, your dad will be back bigger and better. Our best prayers are with you and the family.
Walk on with hopes in our hearts and you'll never walk alone.
I often say to the young people of our church that Love is not just a feeling but a decision, because if it's only a feeling it is subject to change. But when we decide to love no matter what, then it is independent to feeling...We can then love even when we don't feel it. So, better love him @surpassinggoogle even sometimes we don't feel loving our parents...God bless you sir!
God, comfort and relieve those who are troubled in mind and spirit including Terry's dad. Bring them hope, peace and the consolation of a loving community.Lord, in your mercy, hear our prayer. Grant patience and courage to those who need it most especially to the families and friends of those who are ill. Amen.
All my prayers, Terry. I can truly feel you. My sister is living in a mental institution for a decade now and it breaks my heart seeing other people suffer like this. Hugs.
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Oh, sad to hear about your sister @bloghound, yeah it hurts when we see our loved ones in this situation :( yes it really hurts :(
Stay strong terry, you are not alone in this hard time, we all are with you <3
Can I adopt your style of writing? @surpassinggoogle?
hahaha you can but it is almost impossible to because I dont write. I talk
;)
It is so much easier for me to talk rather than write too. My first instinct is always to record a post or book rather than write it. More flows, unplanned during talk.
Easier to edit and choose what's said when writing though. Right now I have a sequel grieving post to my Father's Day one that's done. If I had recorded it via audio, I would have just posted it on DLive and forgotten about it. But it's written. And so raw. And I feel like editing so much of it. ;)
That's why your Saturday Talks are so healing, Sir Terry. Because you talk and allow yourself to be inspired before and while you speak so healing energy can flow and Bless. Thank you for facilitating healing in so many ways while you talk and through your every initiative, be it #untalented, #teardrops, #SteemGigs, #Ulogs/ #Uloggers etc. Thank you and Bless you and may God continue to guide and Bless and use you as a channel for healing on planet Earth. xxx
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yes, I can :p I'm talking about the formatting style of your post :p I think you didn't got me :p
Thank you so much for your beautiful prayer, @bloghound.
This is what I feel so much here after becoming aware of Sir Terry's/ SurpassingGoogle's Saturday Talks and being with everyone there:
Thank you for speaking that in words, in prayer.
My sister was also locked away for years in the mental section of an old people's home even though she only had MS (that was in remission) and was younger than me.
By the time she was 'allowed' to live in the 'normal' section, she had deteriorated so much because she had no one to talk to all those years except the nurses and caregivers and my mother and I when we called every day. She'd lost the heart to walk because there was only a very short corridor to walk and she wasn't allowed outside to feel the warmth of the sun or to see her beloved flowers, etc.
Blessings to you and your sister and your entire family, @bloghound. I will hold her in my heart and in my prayers. xxx
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I join faith with you @Surpassinggoogle and with @Fatherfaith to say:
God's in in control.
God is good all the time, throw all your burden unto him, seek his guidance and surely you can pass all this testing of life. Just keep believing to Jehovah, He wipe your tears Terry...Prayers for your Dad and for you, hoping that all is good at the end.
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Indeed love goes beyond feelings. Often times it's a choice and stand in what you believe is and not ought to be.
I am proud of your strength and your undaunting stance for possibilities. I hope all goes well...
You are a strong man and you always have my heart
I am sorry you are going through
such a sad time and due to my illness
and recovery I understand . . . somewhat
because your grief is yours. I can only hope
it will help you do what you do best . . .
help others. Bless you, my friend.
I LOVE YOU and pray for you.