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RE: Quitting Life: Finish the Story Competition Entry

in #writing6 years ago

Oo this is a very attention grabbing ending! I like the detail of the egg, and the possible ways a reader can take it, did someone care about her? A final gift from someone whos life she had inadvertently brightened? A message of something to come in the new world? I initially took the very ending to be she found wild humans, the pale white, the fire, the calling, but reading your comments, this could have been taken a lot of ways. I see this as a really good thing in a story, I say this far too often, but a story is not the words on a page, but instead something intangible that forms in the space between author and reader, and here, you have created a story with many possible incarnation, depending on what the reader brings.

I struggle a lot with how much to say, and tend to over or under do it. I like things being left a bit vague, you could have put more in, to create a stronger link between to the images, but I totally appreciate the wanting to respect the audience and not spell things out. And anyway, something a bit of mystery makes things more memorable ;)

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Sorry for the late reply, been travelling. I did intend for the ending to indicate she had found wild humans as you said. I did want to leave a bit of mystery, but I think I left a little bit too much! I think it would have been better with a couple more sentences, to make things clearer. Thanks very much for taking the time to write a review. Really enjoyed your prompt, built a great atmosphere for us to work with.