"Steemit Challenge s28wk2 : Remembering Through Healing

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Although Tina lived with her mum, loved her, wished she could spend more time with her, she feared her more than she respected her.

This brought in resentment. Love from a distance. The relationship that was made by blood alone. No emotions. No friendship.

Despite all these, Tina prayed all her life, day and night, that her mother could give her a chance to love her as a daughter, and not as another regular human being who stopped by.

But Tina’s mum had a different case. A different wish. A different desire. To be free. Free from the trauma. Free from beholding her daughter’s face, and having her around. Yet, she wanted to love her daughter. To cherish her. To hold her close and whisper only sweet words to Tina. But she couldn’t.

The world was against her. She was judged. She had a lot going on. Some of which Tina got confused about because of her friends in school.

On different occasions, she's had to hear different things about her mother. But she wasn't bold enough to ask her mother about them. Her mother scared the life out of her. They could only live in the same apartment, greet each other, and say thank you when necessary.

Sometimes, Tina tried so hard to understand where her mother came from, where she was headed, or why she even thought to bring her to this world in the first place.

Tina obviously couldn’t bring herself here all by herself. So why the bitterness? The distance on the same bed while they slept together. A tiny room they could afford felt like a mansion with two indifferent roommates. She just couldn’t wrap her head around it.

And how she’s here on the news of her mother’s death is totally against her will. But the lawyer insisted that she be present while they sold the house.

Tina wanted everything over with. The memories were stuck in that building, and she couldn’t wait to sell it out.

That very evening, she was restless. She was drowsy but couldn’t sleep. To help her sleep off, she went through their little old bookshelf to pick a book and see the wonder that’d come with reading with a dim light.

Suddenly, she noticed a rough paper under the bed. She tried to pull it out, but noticed it was attached to a book.

She dusted it and flipped through to see if it could be useful. Hang on! Her birthday caught her attention. She knew the mother loved to write. But she never had an idea of the things she wrote about. The mother wouldn’t let her anywhere near what she was doing.

Now, she had to flip a few pages back to see what led to that. Rape! Tina’s eyes were filled with tears. She sat up reading every word like she was doing research on a project.

Tina’s mother was raped. She was abused by her stepfather and driven away from home. The community was against her.

Friends advised her to abort the baby, including her own mother, who was Tina's grandmother. But she wanted Tina to have a life. Not that kind of life, but she knew it was murder in a polished way and manner.

How could she live her life knowing she snuffed out another's life even before they got to breathe?

The stigma stayed with her everywhere she went. She couldn’t deal with it any longer, so while she was constantly reminded by people in her workplace, she’d transfer the aggression to Tina.
She loved her, wanted to protect her, but history made it difficult for her.

Even at that, Tina attended a good school and had pretty things as long as her mother was able to afford them.

Now, Tina’s mum had been battling with high blood pressure for years, but fought it all alone till her last breath.
Tina couldn’t stop crying. She understood the reason behind the drama. And she felt guilty instantly.

It wasn’t her fault entirely, so she accepted it and moved on.

That house became her second home whenever she visited home. Her mother lived freely in her heart. And she remained ever grateful to her for not giving up on her even while it was tough for them.

Sometimes, we love and care while hurting to prevent another from being hurt.

Would like to invite @josepha, @saintkelvin17, and @ukpono to take part in the challenge.