I Met a Man From Macedonia
An American Living in Germany.
There are times in life when we cross paths with strangers that often affect us in profound ways. These chance meetings may shape our perspective of the world around us or even alter the course of our entire lives. Yesterday I had such an encounter and it came in the most unexpected way.
It came from the washing machine repairman.
Last week my entire family was infected with a nasty stomach bug that left us all very sick. The children are still too young to know how to handle themselves when sickness arises and it left us with a large abundance of bedding to be washed.
As fate has a way of doing things, our washing machine broke down at the worst possible time. We were left with a mountain of puke-covered sheets, pillows, blankets, and clothing. This is not a pleasant thing to have around the house, but luckily we were rescued by my mother-in-law and her washing machine.
It wasn't until yesterday that Samsung was able to send a repairman out to the house to get us back in operation. Given that my German isn't as good as it should be, my wife had been in contact with the firm and she called me beforehand to warn me that they were on their way.
“Careful,” she said. “The man is Russian and I don't think he wants to spend too much time there, make sure that he tries everything to fix it and not just give up right away.".
In Germany, customer service is nothing like it is in the states, the consumer has to fight for everything, and my wife knows I do not have German level negotiating skills to deal with these types of situations.
I wasn't worried, though. I was not about to let this guy leave our house without us having a functional wash machine and I made it my duty to make sure that he would get the job done.
When he arrived I told him right away that my German was “Nicht so gut” and he immediately relaxed. “English?” he asked. “Yes, please!”. I was relieved.
We connected right off the bat. In this part of Germany, it is rare to find others to conversate in English with and there aren't many other nonrefugee immigrants either.
He and I are two foreigners, from different parts of the world, trying to find our place in a new country. Only for him, he has had to find his way alone. Due to German law he must spend his first two years here alone satisfying countless requirements before they will allow him to bring his wife and three children here from Macedonia.
He shared with me his entire journey, his hardships with German culture, and his desire to return home. For him, though, he has no choice. It is not safe for his family back home and he is making the best for his family by bringing them here to Germany.
There was no refugee status for him, there is no “war” there anymore even though it never really ended. He gets no tax relief for being a working man with a wife and kids because they don't live here. Just him.
He chuckled nervously when he to told me that his taxes were paying for immigrants and families who didn't work or speak German and he was here alone doing his best. There was a sadness in his eyes as he spoke.
He shared his struggles with having darker skin and a funny last name, even though he wasn't one of “them”. He could not imagine how someone would give up the dream, as he called it, in America for a boring, bureaucratic, strict Germany.
I explained to him that my experience was entirely different. I have a German last name, German wife, and German children. I love the order and respect of the German people. Our small community has strict cultural norms that protect our children as well as the village we live in.
His opinion wouldn't be swayed and I was not trying to sway it. His experience was his own and it was real. Mine was different, I was welcomed here and in fact, I was invited. It is easy to become swept up in the politics of immigration and miss stories of hardship such as his.
While living in Munich, the Macedonia man had witnessed a brutal attack on a German woman by (non-Germans) and it scared him so much that he requested a transfer through his job up North where these attacks are less common. He is happy here now and smiled when he said his apartment is cheaper too!
By the time he was finished fixing the machine, I was sad to see him go. Even though our experiences are so different, we had a strong connection based on our circumstances and it made us happy to share them with someone who could understand. It was a truly moving human moment, one that I will not forget. I am thankful to be humbled by this man's experiences and reminded of how lucky I am sometimes and for this, I am truly grateful.
On a daily basis most of us pass by others oblivious to who they are, how they feel, what experiences they have had, their hopes and fears. I wonder sometimes about opportunities or possibilities lost as each of those people pass by in the other direction, unengaged. Of course we can't stop every passerby and have a chat.
It seems you've had one of those rare interactive moments with a complete stranger and it has left you feeling something more than you were before? A reminder of the fortune within your own life, family, health, free speech...Whatever. It's a good moment and it's obviously touched you in some way. Well done, and thanks for sharing.
By the way...If I make it to Germany and can get up near your way I'm coming over, or we'll hit a pub for a schnitty (Schnitzel)...I don't speak much German, only what I learned at school and I was an indifferent student at best. Still, I speak English, Australian, American, Australian slang and Swear...So, I reckon we'll be able to communicate pretty well. 😁
It's so true. So many missed opportunities I am sure. I am normally not such an open person either so this has taught me to become a little better at that. The simplest things like not judging a book by its cover can make a huge difference!
Oh you will get along fine! Plus beer is the universal language! 🤣 thanks so much for your comment!
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I kind of get that man's position. Coming from Eastern Europe I've had a pretty hard time as well. My German was very poor when I got there, nobody would talk to me in English and explain me in details some things I couldn't understand at work but this way I learned German the best I could. I still am at a conversational level but I can make myself understood and I can have a simple conversation with anyone as long as they don't speak any dialect. I don't regret my experience there because I wanted it so bad, but I don't like Germany at all and it would be some of my last options if I would move out of the country again.
I lived in Norway as a foreigner as well and is much easier and everybody speaks English there. Even the older one. In your case is way easier coming from the States and having a German wife and kids that are born there. You should be grateful for that. It's good karma that you have :)
Wouldn't move to US either, I don't like it at all. I might move to Austria though. Haven't tried it yet.
I totally understand why Germany is not for everyone and I am sure it varies by region as well. I can only speak for our little piece of country up here in the North! I would love to visit all of those countries especially Romania! How would the welcome an American there? Of course I will spend the rest of my life here in Germany, but I still want to travel.
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In Romania we welcome pretty well foreigners and we speak whatever language we know. We are not that nationalists as the Germans. We are very flexible when it comes to justice and corruption as well so we're not better than the Germans. German language is an interesting and worth learning language but not easy at all.
I really hope to visit one day!
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BTW my German is good enough to know what I’m doing but pretty bad so people usually think I’m just a moron, not a foreigner 🤣
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Bwahaha!
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Your tale reinforces the truth of 'two sides to every coin'. We often cannot see the other side as our vision is clouded by our own existence. I feel as though he was as enriched by the chance meeting as you were.
I think so. Sometimes we are so focused on our own goings-on that we miss what's happening around us. It was very enlightening. Thanks so much for taking the time to read my post! It was a long one 🤣
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Amazing write up. Hope all of you are over the stomach sickness.
Being from Serbia, in Australia I get the feeling how it is to move to the other country where everything is a bit odd and operates completely differently to what we are used to.
Again, I did some travel and visiting friends in Europe; and collected several Macedonian friendships along the way - I must say they are people with big hearts at least the ones I encountered.
Wow Australia? That’s really awesome! I would love to get there at least once in my life. I have several friends who moved there from the US as well. Kids are still a little rough but getting better, thank you! Hopefully I can meet some more amazing souls my short time here on the earth, that’s what it’s all about!
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Thank you, much appreciated!
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Thank you!
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People from different walks of life are scattered all over. You could meet anyone anywhere
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That is very true
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Howdy again sir badger! What a wonderful meeting that you didn't expect, I love those! I wish that man success.