I soooo wish for you to feel better and outlive your dogs by many years!
There's this thing where people hold out for Christmas, or some other holiday or family occasion, and once it's passed, they finally let go, hence, an epidemic of funerals right after Christmas. I don't want to sound morbid. But if those dogs are your "bribe for living," as Jack London once put it, if they help you find the incentive to keep going, then may they live forever!