BEASTLY TALES

A REFRESHING PUNCH

Fear not, kind sir, it matters not one whit!
Indeed it matters not even a minuscule bit,
He has that sort of face, seen either at breakfast or lunch,
That makes one want it, to soundly punch!
He did so, and was charged with assault and battery,
So no amount of cajolery, compliment or flattery,
Would suffice to exonerate him for punching that face,
Yes, that whole matter was viewed as a major disgrace.

“But, Your Honour, his smirking, beaming appearance,”
“Stimulates one to initiate facial interference.”
“Hence the old swift “one, two,” punches that so readily flew”
“His mug was screaming for more drastic punishment due.”
“To wipe that insincere smile from his face,”
“Look at this photograph, I rest my case!”
“The last refuge for a scoundrel is in politics,”
“That’s why he’s running for the seat of Hicks!”
The Judge lowered his half-moon glasses on his nose,
“That may be true, but not cause for “anything goes.”
“You have been more than a bit of a dolt,”
“Winding up here, charged with aggravated assault!”
“How do you plead, not guilty, I suppose,”
“Trial will be set for next month,” and then the court rose.
Doodles Dropkick, for that was the defendants name,
Thought he’d come out of such a trial without any blame.

Exhibit “A”, photograph of the victim,
Gave ample reason why he had punched him, and kicked him.
With such a smarmy, insincere mug,
No wonder he’d been set upon, like a thug!
The case was dropped, couldn’t waste the courts time.
They had plenty to occupy them with REAL CRIME!