‘Smoking no good for healthy.’

These are the words I heard for the 100th time yesterday from another random Vietnamese. The expression on their face was one of concern whilst they believed they were blindsiding me with an epiphany regarding the dangers of smoking. No smoker is under the illusion that cigarettes are magically extending their lives or that the radioactive substances they contain are providing cartoonish super- powers.

Cigarettes only benefit three types of people:

1. Hungry people who live in developing societies where cigarettes are cheaper than food - It is well known that cigarettes act as an appetite suppressant.

2. Fat people. In the short term the reduction in hunger would shrinken their stomachs and reduce their cravings. that or kill them off more swiftly - which would be a win-win for society, if we view it expediently.

3. Teenagers and babies, so that they can look cool and mature quicker.

Unless you fall into one of the above 3 categories there is no excuse for the continuation of smoking.

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Quitting smoking in 3 steps

1. Keep it a secret that you’re quitting

This isn’t about being a hardened, lone wolf character. Your friends don’t want you to succeed, both smokers and non-smokers.

Smokers

They don’t want you to succeed at something they have failed at. Your victory will make them appear feeble. It’s known as crab mentality. You can leave live crabs in an open bucket and even though they could escape none are able. The other crabs will pull the escape artists back down into the bucket, sometimes murdering them.

Non-smokers

They don’t care. You’re scum to them by being addicted in the first place. They have moral superiority regardless your trivial success or failure.

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2. Change your brand of cigarette

Start buying the ones containing the least amount of nicotine and tar. Smoke as you normally would for a week. Avoid overcompensating for the weaker hit by smoking more than you habitually would.

3. Resist cold turkey

Gradually cut down your daily intake of the drug and so that once you cut it out completely the fallout will be minimal.

1. Set yourself a limit of half your usual intake.
   A smoker who smokes 20 a day would have a limit of 10 per day. Smoke to this limit for 5 days.

Count out this exact amount of cigarettes in your box every day to prevent going over limit.

1. Reduce the limit by 20%. Smoke the new amount for 2 days.

2. Keep reducing your limit until you reach a 3 cigarette limit. Then smoke 3 cigarettes for two days, 2 cigarettes for two days and then 1 cigarette for a week.

3. Reduce one cigarette a day to no cigarettes and continue like this forever.

This method is 100% successful, I should know as I’ve used it dozens of times.

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