I will never use this thing
Throughout my life, I have accumulated a great deal of stuff that, honestly, I can never really hope to use. Sometimes it's stuff I'm done using, but I don't want to throw or give it away because it might be useful again someday. Sometimes I can't bear to throw things away because they remind me of places I've been or things I have experienced. Sometimes it is stuff that was on sale and such a great deal, or it is just so cool I cannot resist it, or a friend was going to throw it away and asked me if I wanted it first; "Oh sure, thank you!" In these ways and more, I have accumulated a great deal of physical cruft, and every day I feel more and more that it is weighing me down; somehow I even feel trapped by my own belongings.
Image by time2org on Pixabay. CC0.
I used to think I was not a hoarder because I saw the people on those television shows and I saw how they lived and that was not me. I do not have stacks of rubbish up to my ceiling and my entire home is not completely inaccessible save for one tiny path from the bedroom to the kitchen. I think, though, that it does not have to be that extreme for it to be a problem.
Recently, I had to rip apart my entire collection of things and stuff in order to look for something extremely important, and on a tight schedule, too. My heart was pounding as I tore everything apart, desperately looking and just getting absolutely lost. I ended up finding it in time. However, while doing this I realised just how disorganised I am. How could I ever hope to find anything I am looking for when I have piles and boxes of things I have saved for no reason?
I've had a sort of introspective epiphany: there are multiple reasons I hoard things. I don't have the best memory in the world and have often thought I might have some sort of early-onset dementia, so I do keep a lot of things because of their sentimental value. Throughout the years I have used this as a justification for hoarding everything, no matter what the reason.
I realised, though, that these sentimental things are usually quite small. Tickets and papers and receipts and little knickknacks here and there. There is nothing about a secondhand half-broken paper shredder that has sentimental value to me. It is worthless junk. It is not worth my time to fix. What do I even need a paper shredder for? As technologically-inclined as I am, I hardly ever use paper for anything; as paranoid as I am, if I should find some scribbled scrap of paper in need of destruction, I set fire to the sucker. I don't play around.
The uncomfortable truth is, I don't only hoard things because of my memory problems. I hoard things because of my hoarding problem; because for some reason I am hard-wired to collect as many things as I possibly can and never let any of them go. I don't know why I am like this, but looking back, I have been, all my life; even as a child.
I have been trying for years to organise and catalogue my things and I always end up overwhelmed in the end and give up, because there is just too much. I want to stop worrying about whether I will someday need something like this thing, because what use will it be when that day comes and I can't find it among all the other stuff? Actually, I'll probably have forgotten I ever even had it in the first place!
I started writing this post before the New Year and am just now finding it in my drafts and finishing it. I suppose it is a bit too late to make a New Year's resolution now, but that is fine. It might be a cliché to say I don't believe in them, but it's true, because if you plan it in advance as so many people do, it puts off fixing a problem you recognise and acknowledge. I see it as a form of procrastination, which I get enough of already in my life (see: taking several months to finish up and publish this post).
As January closes, I find that I have the ambition and the drive to make this change now, and that is what counts. So, from now on I am going to try, as much as I can manage, to learn to say: "No; I will never use this thing." Slowly but surely, maybe I can teach myself the art of letting go. 🍋
You know what I want a second hand paper shredder for? Plastic.
For a long time I've wanted to recycle plastic for use in a 3d printer. You can either build a machine to make your own filament, or make a 3d printer that runs on small plastic chunks. A cross cut shredder might be able to be modified to be used to shred pieces of plastic if large chunks are broken down first somehow.
Sounds like your biggest problem is an organization problem though. Is it really better to throw some shit out for some asshole to put it in a hole in the ground? Nah. It's better to figure out a way to reuse it, or someone else that needs it. So maybe you need to do some spring cleaning and organization. And maybe organize a schedule as well. Throw out the stuff that needs to be thrown out. Recycle the things that need to be recycled. Give away stuff that can't be sold, if it can be, and you don't need it. Frame the sentimental things or put them on a shelf. And all the shit you don't wanna throw out, organize it and put it in boxes and shit.
Spring is just around the corner. Perfect time to start some Spring Cleaning.
Once I went to my bff house and realised most of the drawers in her forniture were empty. It surprised me. In my home there's never been a tiny spot left empty, there's always stuff, garbage, everywhere. Later I realised this wasn't normal. We're all used to it in my family, we life to go through the old drawers and other hidden spots full of ol things.... So of course I am like that too, I accumulate stuff. When I came into Yoga, I became seriously aware of it, because there is something called "Aparigraha" that literally tells you not to accumulate. And since then I've had a couple of crisis where i throw out a lot of things without even noticing. Last time I moved out I just couldn't stand the amount of stuff and I just cried, and I had to call my grandma to help me pack. She's the queen of hoarders in the family so xD hahaha
I have a single box that holds what has become sentimental to me over the years.
As far as New Year Resolutions it’s never too late to start and more importantly start right away. I got a few things I’m working on myself.
I wish you much success in lifting the burden all these things have caused you over the years by them piling up.
As someone who has moved 4 times before the age of ten, I've been conditioned to do a "full cleanup" once a year: Take one (or several) big trash bags and work your way through your room(s) bit by bit. Start with the shelf/closet/whatever to the left of the door and ask for every item "Did I use this in the last year? How likely is it that I will use it in the next?". If the replies are "no" and "unlikely", there it goes in the trash bag.
(Note: Does not apply to jewelry or photo albums. Does apply to inexpensive decoration).
It's not easy, and you have to learn to let go of things. But it made moving a lot easier, each time. I'm still doing the whole thing 1-2 times a year, and throw away a lot (although, with things that are still usable, I try to give them away for free via a facebook group).
Maybe you can try that on a small scale.
It's time to declutter once in awhile.
Hey; thanks for reading! I noticed you are very new, so... welcome to Steem! I'm pretty technically-minded and I've been around here a while now, so let me know if there's anything I can help you figure out.
Haha I will probably start to hoard old enduros at some point in my life... :D
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