I Don't Always Do This, But, Please Welcome "The Most Interesting Man In The World" To Steemit! ~ 24 SBD Contest & ComedyOpenMic Week #3 Judge's Entry

in #comedyopenmic7 years ago (edited)

I don't always write contest posts about famous men with beards joining Steemit, but when I do, I want to get some laughs.

Just ask "The Most Interesting Man In the World" who just joined Steemit! If you're not familiar with this worldwide icon, please enjoy doing your research at this hilarious link. If you don't laugh, please consult your local physician.

To warm up, here are a few facts about him from his XX commercials...

  • "The last time he flirted with danger, danger got clingy."
  • "Mosquitos refuse to bite him, purely out of respect."
  • "He once went to the psychic, to warn her."
  • "His Thank You cards have prompted You're Welcome cards."
  • "He can smooth talk in sign language."
  • "When in Rome, they do as he does."
  • "His mother has a tattoo that says 'Son'."

He wanted me to write this and send his regards since he's on a scuba diving trip with @ned in the rewards pool, where whales fight to follow him. I hope he'll put in a good word for me...

He's just trying to be funny. We'll grab a Dos Equis and iron that out later. Steemit is all about who you know, so if he wants to get anywhere on this platform, he'd better introduce us some of the hot women he's always hanging with. I have no doubt that he wants to be successful on Steemit, so I'm thrilled.

I'm now a judge for #comedyopenmic, so this entry is just for fun to promote the contest and get more laughs going.

To make things more most interesting, I'm also holding a contest within a contest here. Mind blowing, right??

Here's the "Most Interesting Line" contest:

Following my template below, hit me with as many of your best lines as you can. If you're not familiar with this worldwide phenomenon, here's that research link again. Resteems are appreciated to get the word out to grow Steemit's comedy community.

The "Most Interesting Line" will get 14 SBD, the Second will get 6 SBD, the Third will get 3 SBD, and Honorable Mention 1 SBD. These will be payable when this post closes. You'll also get my upvote and good exposure to the judges for future contest entries.

Thanks to @punchline (10 STEEM), @dj123 (4 SBD), and @idikuci (3 SBD), for their generous donations to boost the prize pool! They did this on their own, so let's make them proud.

There are two formats (1) as I listed in the examples above, or, (2) I don't always..., but when I do, I..." These should all be related to Steemit.

Here are first -9- 6 Steemit comments about the "The Most Interesting Man In The World" I whipped up, to be judged by the man himself over a Dos Equis and Cuban cigar on is private island:

  1. He doesn't always claim his rewards, but when he tries, his rewards claim HIM.
  2. He recently gave @berniesanders the last word and Bernie returned it as a courtesy.
  3. SMTs are delayed because @sneak realized they were already patented by him, 10 years ago.
  4. He once flagged @ned, who laughed and created the first Steemit Fool's Day to honor the occasion.
  5. He once upvoted @mrs.steemit's post by winking at his computer, and she blushed.
  6. When he delegated his Steem power to @minnowbooster, they matched his allocation five times over just to thank him.

I wanted to do more, but that damn gif was too good to not use.

Don't hold anything back. This man has done everything we could ever dream of, while surrounded by beautiful foreign women, so nothing will hurt his feelings.

Make sure you enter in the #comedyopenmic contest every week (two entries max) and check out the #punchline community. I'm running the @comedyopenmic account this week and will take the time to read/watch/understand all of your crazy jokes. I should probably book a therapist for next week.

Sources: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7

Hope this was fun. Please share this to spread the word about #comedyopenmic and my contest.

XX,
@steemmatt

Sort:  

The last time he aggrandized, @ned upvoted him for it.

He doesn’t always use bots to upvote six and a half day old posts, but when he does, @grumpycat sends him a thank you card and 50 SBD’s.

He resteems all of your posts...three days before you create them.

He posts on zappl...and it works.

The reward pool tries to rape him.

The last time he aggrandized, @ned upvoted him for it.

hahah oh that tickled my funny bone yodie ;)

He doesn’t always use bots to upvote six and a half day old posts, but when he does, @grumpycat sends him a thank you card and 50 SBD’s.

bwahahah .....ok, you gotta go check out @madpuppy, it's gonna be raining kats and dogfights soon

The reward pool tries to rape him.

muahahah Steem just became an orgy!

ROTFL!

He once told @punchline to add 1 steem to the prize pool. @punchline added 10.

He once said thank you so much, that Wayne's World decided to make another sequel just to recreate this scene for him.


Source

oh sexymatty on all 4s......Schwiinnggg!

HA.

You got me ... Excellent!!

oh sexymatty, arnie can wait, you know how to push my buttons, we've got the ultimate come back one liners with the most interesting man in the world:

"He once made a technological review, and @taskmasters4450 has an orgasm"

"He usually doesn't do a travel post, but when he does @sweetsssj book her flight immediately and flies there the next day"

"He once show his prowess as a man of the soil, and @papa-pepper had to make a lamb sacrifice and the whole homestead community howl in recognition"

"He once did a post to funny, and @traflagar laughed so hard he went catatonic and still haven't revived from his coma to do a post till this day"

"He don't always do podcast, but when he did one with @aggroed, everyone tuned in and netflix and youtube shutdown for the day"

"He doesn't bother with TA or predictions, but one time he said he like Steem, and @ranchorelaxo was so satisfied he forgot to upvote @haejin for a whole week"

p.s. go check your wallet ;)

You just made my judging decisions so much harder. You knew exactly what you were doing here and I like it.

Your @papa-pepper line is pure gold or #steemsilvergold. The Steem TA line was also off the wall. All of them teased with my repressed hope that some may actually now see and vote on this post. Thanks for this stellar contribution in content and your SBD prize pool grant.

well if haejin and ranchorelaxo upvotes this post you know you have arrived :P cough...unlikely

tip: keep up & encourage the positive cross comment interaction, that's what adds great value to the post and the followers

I think all
Of these comments deserve to be carved in stone ! "He once made a technological review, and @taskmasters4450 has an orgasm"" this one is probably my favorite lol

yeah it's pretty sweet, so sweet that i'm looking forward to TM banning me from the steemit geek club hence forth

Haha nice competition I love it :D

Here goes:
"He doesn't need approval to join Steemit, Steemit needs his approval"

"He posts don't get views, they get stares"

"He once shook your hand at a Steemit meetup, you now cover it with a garbage bag to shower"

"He once complimented a minnow, they instantly became a big fish"

"His profile doesn't say followers, it says fans"

"I don't always post comments, but when I do I have been drinking Dos Equis"

not bad

"His profile doesn't say followers, it says fans"

But this one is just too cool not to mention:

"He once shook your hand at a Steemit meetup, you now cover it with a garbage bag to shower"

Clap! Clap! Well done ;)

Haha thanks yeah that one is my favorite also :D

Wow, I must say that you seriously stepped up your game here. These are really solid. I like a lot of them and am equally questioning why I didn't think of them. Great job!

Haha thanks m8, I'm glad you liked them. I have had a good laugh out of this too :D

Hahha awesome - all of Them !

Thanks m8 I'm glad you liked them :)

I really like "His posts don't get views, they get stares"

When he joined steemit, he became a whale instantly, then they made the "kraken" class just for him.

Every time he makes a post, STEEM pumps on coin market cap.

His upvote could get @berniesanders reputation up to 100.

He takes up all 100 witness positions.

His curation is equivalent to the GDP of Norway.

He is, the most interesting man in the world.

Kraken line = brilliant. 3/4 love it 1/4 hate it for you thinking of that instead of me.

Bernie line was great too. If you get the chance, throw me one or two on my Chuck Norris post linked at the top just to see what else you're made of.

I appreciate it! I'm always up to a challenge...

He visited a Steem promo party in Stockholm 10 months ago, now there is a new baby boom in Sweden and Imports of Dos Equis has increased by one million percent as the babies prefer it instead of milk.

He once chugged a Dos Equis so fast the Steemit reward pool dried up for two weeks

He once hooked up with Schwarzenegger's wife and then sent a message to Arnold on Steemit saying "I'll be back" and then he muted him.

He is so charismatic that when he farts woman fall in love with him and his Steemit reputation increases by a hundred percent

Whenever he sends sbd through blocktrades they give him an exchange rate of 1:1 to BTC

He doesn't always post using hashtag #punchline, but when he does, it is more than three lines.

He doesn't always use gifs, but when he does he wins Academy Awards for best picture.

He doesn't always post NSFW, but when he does the lady's reputation score is 70.

He once posted an instrumental cover, and people actually noticed.

He could convince @trafalgar to submit a ComedyOpenMic entry

He wrote the only article that made it to trending AND was interesting to read (thats probly a stretch)

hey don't jinx it, we still got our fingers cross that traffy comes to support our community with something amazing

I don't always upvote peoples blogs, but when I do its worth a million SBD.

I've resteemed. I'll be back for my entry tonight after work. Just you wait Henry Higgins.

Thank you!
Yes, ma'am!