I don't know what to say and so will say what I generally do in these situations...Your mom is no longer where she once was, she is everywhere you go because you carry her with you in your memories.

I lost my mum to cancer in 2004 when she was 59 and so I understand how you may feel, or not feel...It's an odd time and we all handle it differently; It's a journey. All the best to you and your family, I'm sorry for your loss.