That's an amazing piece of writing @blewitt... So touching, the struggle of two brothers to find their new relation to each other - because I believe you both are looking to connect to in your own ways. There will be a space for both of you where you feel comfortable being with each other and feel like 'brothers' - these things take time. And yes, often tragedy helps us connect. A sad truth. It's often that I hear about funerals how they were sad but gave a warm feeling at the same time - often family finally gets together for the first time in ages. When will we learn? Probably never, as indeed, these things are part of life how we tend to live it.

Hugs for you, and your brother, he looks like a great guy.