Comparison

Why do I still troll social media looking at pictures is people I know and compare myself to them, women of a certain age group? What am I missing here about myself, in fact I’m not missing anything, I am meticulously looking at every inch of myself and pulling it apart as less than perfect.

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself just as I am

I forgive myself that I haven’t seen/realised and understood how perfect, or my version of perfect Is just an opinion

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create an opinion about myself as imperfect, and then within this project myself out in looking for the so called imperfections in others, specifically woman of a certain age

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to ‘down grade’ My body as old and finished now , and within that tell myself that I will struggle to keep my skin in good condition along with the rest of my body, by telling myself that it gets harder to maintain oneself when one is of a certain age

I commit myself to look at the word perfect and who I am within perfect - what perfection means to me, where did I get this idea of what is perfect?

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge the word perfect, to create a belief within and as me that I when I compare myself to another there will always be differences and within this there is no ‘good or bad’ per se - only my interpretation of what I see as good or bad.

I commit myself to redefine the word perfect, to live the word perfect as me being the best version of myself, within and without the perfection of equality, no good or bad but what is here standing as the best that I can be in mind and body no comparison to others as judgement - I see realise and understand how I can appreciate‘Beauty’ as my definition but that within this remind myself that we are all unique and when I practice the living of the words perfect and beauty I equalise myself within, so that I start to see the beauty and uniqueness that is me, and I remind myself that when I see with REAL Eyes I will start to see the uniqueness in all things and that my experience of what I see as beauty is just my definition based on how I experience myself as ugly, and may not be seen in the same way by others, and even if it is, I stand comfortably as who I am as me.