The Ugly Dildo

The Ugly Dildo owned a stretchman that they would occasionally watch for 10 minutes every morning. It is an exciting suggestion, to me and my parents, but not to the Dildo, who had decided that this idea was sublime. You wouldnt have thought, a stretchman was the item that was chosen.

The Ugly Dildo always had with them a pencil sharpener that they would put down their trousers. It might be an odd undertaking, to my neighbour, but not to the Dildo, who feels that the idea was wonderful. You wouldnt have thought, a pencil sharpener is the item to opt for.

The Ugly Dildo wanted a pint of beer that they liked to throw. It is considered to be an exciting thought, to most, but not to the Dildo, who felt that this idea was exciting. Who would have thought, a pint of beer of all things.

The Ugly Dildo desperately searched for a bat that they would occasionally hug. One might find this to be a fairly strange activity, to me and my parents, but not to the Dildo, who thought that this idea was magnificent. Who would have imagined, a bat having that done to it

The Ugly Dildo always had with them a vibrator to eat. This seems a somewhat surprising thing to do, to you, but not to the Dildo, who thought that this idea was miraculous. Who would have thought, a vibrator of all things.

The Ugly Dildo needed a custard pie that they liked to put down their trousers. It is considered to be a fairly new idea, to my grandma, but not to the Dildo, who had come to the conclusion that the idea was spectacular. Who would have imagined, a custard pie would be the thing that was selected.