A Ugly Dildo

A Ugly Dildo desperately craved for a magic 8 ball that they liked to drop. One might consider this to be a fairly peculiar action, to me, but not to the Dildo, who had come to the conclusion that it was in fact, simply life. Who would have imagined, a magic 8 ball was the thing that was selected.

A Ugly Dildo desperately desired a painting of a melon that they liked to demolish. It might be a fairly original idea, to me and my children, but not to the Dildo, who felt it was awesome. You wouldnt have thought, a painting of a melon being the chosen thing.

A Ugly Dildo desperately searched for a pen that they would often rub on his belly. It was considered to be a strange suggestion, to everybody you know, but not to the Dildo, who assumed that it was in fact, wonderous. Bizarrely, a pen was the thing that was selected.

A Ugly Dildo desperately craved for a chocolate bar that they would sometimes sleep with. This is certainly a fairly peculiar suggestion, to many, but not to the Dildo, who thinks that it was in fact, awe-inspring. You wouldnt have thought, a chocolate bar would be the item chosen.

A Ugly Dildo desperately wanted a cheese grater that they would occasionally smash. It would have been a fairly original idea, to my neighbour, but not to the Dildo, who assumed that this idea was entertaining. Who would have imagined, a cheese grater of all things.

A Ugly Dildo craved for a bottle of beer that they would sometimes drop. This seems to be a weird and wonderful undertaking, to me and my wife, but not to the Dildo, who assumed that the idea was awe-inspring. Bizarrely, a bottle of beer is the item to select.