"Should or shouldn't I have sex with a man who is not my True Love?"

Excerpt: It's funny, you know. We are so used to be judged that even when it comes to joy and fun in life, things that really do good for our body and soul, we come up with old and archaic doctrines that raise doubts. Religions have controlled our minds for so long, scolding us for being sinners that need to repent and be careful, because of the deity, 'up above' that watches each step we do. When it comes to sex the question we need to ask ourselves is simple - 'is there joy, or not?'. Read Catherine's question and my answer on this matter.

Dear,

I think that someone already asked this, but I need your advice. I have been seeing someone from my college for several months and I can definitely say he’s my boyfriend. I feel love for him but I’m not sure he is my True Lover and I’m not fully convinced that we will live together for the rest of our lives. Last week he asked me again to have sex with him and I really don’t know what to do. Is it wrong to have sex with someone who is not your True Lover? Maybe the word ‘wrong’ is too harsh but you know what I mean.

Thank you

Catherine

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Catherine,

No, it is not wrong to be intimately involved and to have sex with someone whom you do not truly love. It is not wrong because you are never judged; there isn’t any grand entity always watching you from above who decides whether or not you have sinned.

True Love is a state of consciousness that humanity is quickly moving towards. For some people it takes few years to reach that state, whereas for others it may take a whole lifetime and even more. On the journey, we meet many people and have many experiences some more pleasant than others. There is no doubt that when we choose to do certain things the outcomes can impede our journey, and in practice, we take one step forward and three steps backward. Although we learn from such events there is absolutely no need to experience any sadness or any failure on the journey. Your path can really be paved with gold, diamonds and beauty. So by now you already know to appreciate the dark episodes that come upon you and not to judge them.

When two people choose to join together they had better make the conscious decision to unite at all levels; meaning physical, mental, emotional and spiritual. Once this full alliance is made, sex can become one of the most wonderful, rejuvenating and enjoyable experiences for a human being. The intensity of the feelings that are experienced in lovemaking, a kind of art performance, cannot be described in words but has to be felt personally. When you are in bed with someone you truly and genuinely love, you are placing yourself in a sweet place of empowerment, enjoyment and mastery all at the same time. You are fully connected with your body and your spirit and the connection, being perfectly appropriate, leaves no room for anything less than sheer joy, reassurance and happiness.

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At this point, I would like to recommend a book for you to read that briefly discusses sexual force. This book is called “Sexual Force or the Winged Dragon”, and I am convinced that the insights contained in the book will trigger from within you the necessary, silent catalysts which will, in turn, take you forward to many more understandings.

Sexual energy is very potent. It can destroy people or lift them to realization, beyond this realm. The topic deserves a separate post, probably even more than a few, and I do encourage you, for starters, to begin with your own explorations.

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The question may rise now, within you, Catherine, "what am I doing with someone that I do not see as my lifelong partner? Am I compromising?"

And the answer can only come from you. There are times in life when relationships, no matter on which level, serve you greatly on your path. Your body goes through changes, your mind receives new thought-patterns and your spirit is able to rest. In addition, some bad relationships may serve as a reference. Often, we need to experience the dark before we choose light, to suffer before we can really say "no more; I had enough of this S*, now I am ready for joy".

You are aware that you are not with your True Lover. This is fine! However, the fact that you are battling with the question, whether or not to have sex with him, gives a proof, a wonderfully helpful tool, that something bothers you, that you are feeling a lack.

It's not my place to tell you what to do; Nor can I. You are living your life as a marvelous experience. With no judgment from your soul. Once you release the mass-consciousness opinions, you will discover that the answers come forth, easily, smoothly and rather peacefully. You will then find out that JOY is the bedrock of the reality, and then your decisions will become easier to make.

Good Luck!