Her Retarded Elf

Her Retarded Elf desperately desired a vibrator that they would put up their bum. It is a fairly funny idea, to my mum, but not to the Elf, who had come to the conclusion it was the most awesome idea. Bizarrely, a vibrator would be the thing that was selected.

Her Retarded Elf owned a little monkey that they would sometimes sleep with. One might consider this to be an astonishing activity, to my grandma, but not to the Elf, who feels it would be amazing. Remarkably, a little monkey would be the item that was selected.

Her Retarded Elf had a computer that they would occasionally cuddle. It should have been a fairly funny thing to do, to my grandma, but not to the Elf, who expected it was epic. Strangely, a computer was the item that was opted for.

Her Retarded Elf had a CD player to annihilate This could be considered a funny operation, to most, but not to the Elf, who had decided that the idea was fun. A CD player is the thing to choose.

Her Retarded Elf needed a cup that they would smash. One might find this to be a fairly exciting idea, to my grandma, but not to the Elf, who had come to the conclusion that the idea was breathtaking. A cup was the item that was selected.

Her Retarded Elf searched for a can of Dr Pepper that they would insert somewhere. It is considered to be a fairly unusual exercise, to some, but not to the Elf, who thought that this idea is magnificent. Strangely, a can of Dr Pepper being the chosen thing.