Grumpy Elf

Grumpy Elf desperately desired a cucumber that they would sometimes rub on his belly. It was a bizarre idea, to me and my wife, but not to the Elf, who had decided it would be awe-inspring. Remarkably, a cucumber is the item to choose.

Grumpy Elf searched for a porno magazine to demolish. It should have been a fairly unusual activity, to me and my children, but not to the Elf, who had come to the conclusion it was the most awesome idea. Bizarrely, a porno magazine is the thing that was chosen.

Grumpy Elf desired a dildo that they would try to nail to the wall. It is considered to be a weird approach to life, to you, but not to the Elf, who assumed that this idea was spectacular. A dildo was the thing that was opted for.

Grumpy Elf carried a can of coke that they would sometimes break. One might say this is a peculiar action, to some, but not to the Elf, who expected that the idea was amazing. Remarkably, a can of coke of all things.

Grumpy Elf desperately looked for a bottle of beer that they would hug. One might say this is a weird suggestion, to my children, but not to the Elf, who considered that it was in fact, awe-inspring. You wouldnt have thought, a bottle of beer is the thing to opt for.

Grumpy Elf searched for a tomato that they liked to insert somewhere. One might say this is a fairly surprising approach to life, to me and my parents, but not to the Elf, who thinks that this idea is wonderous. Who would have thought, a tomato is the thing to select.